Family Rights Group | Kinship carers’ Forum

Hi there we could someone help I have a child who is 9 month he has been placed on child protection he has been on it 9 month we recently had a conference meeting we was told everyone wanted to step in down to child in need but at the last minute in the conference meeting we was told that the sw manager did not want to step it down as she felt we needed more work. She had originally told my partner he need to do a 6 week bridging to change now at the last minute they want him to do it for 9 months this is due to dv which last incident was early 2017. He has work commitments and he has told them so its hard for him to do the course due to work commitments they said it is not mandatory but if he does not do it then it will be against him. Does that mean they can take our child. And also he and I have done all they have asked and worked well with all the professionals.

Dear THY765

Welcome to Family Rights Group’s family and friends carers’ discussion board and thank you for your post. My name is Suzie, and I am FRG’s online adviser. I think you are a parent so our parents’ discussion board would be better for you to post on. I will reply here today but if you have a further query please post on the parents’ board.

I am sorry to hear of the difficulties you and your family are experiencing. I think you have had a child protection plan in place for your baby since they were born because of domestic violence from your partner, which you say last happened 4 years ago. The plan was due to step down from child protection to child in need but this did not happen as children’s services recommended further work be done.

I think that the 6 week course originally suggested might have been ‘Striving for Change’ for domestic violence perpetrators; it seems to be usually completed first and then followed by the longer-term Bridging to Change course which is 40 weeks (9 months) as you said. I can see that your partner’s work commitments have been a barrier to this. Maybe the course could be completed at least partly online at least while lockdown restrictions are in place. Some programmes certainly are delivered digitally now, but I can’t say for definite if the programme in your area is or will continue to be. I would recommend that your partner rings up the service to discuss his needs and to try to find a way forward.

Children’s services have said that the course is not mandatory. They are recommending it as it is a specialist, focused programme which helps men who have been abusive to their partners to take responsibility for their behaviour and to make and keep up improvements. Your baby is vulnerable and is seen as being at risk due to the domestic violence. So, if there is a way that your partner can make sure that he can do this or another similar course then this would really help reduce concerns. You would also get support, I believe.

It does not mean that children’s services would look to remove your baby if your partner does not complete the course, but it is probably the main way in which he could show that he is able to manage situations without using violence and that he will do what is needed to keep the baby safe too.

If children’s services assessed that the risk to your child was so serious, they could ask your partner to agree to leave the family home. If they wanted to remove your child, they would have to obtain a court order to do so unless you consented.

If children’s services are concerned that a child protection plan is not progressing, or the situation is becoming riskier they could hold a Public Law Outline meeting to discuss the issues and way forward. You would be invited to attend and to take a solicitor with you (you would not have to pay for the solicitor). They would have to tell you if they were thinking of doing this.

From the information you have provided this does not seem to be the case. You have both worked well with the professionals, it seems. The best thing to do may be for you and your partner to arrange a meeting with the social worker and their manager to discuss your partner’s options for attending a behaviour change perpetrators' programme, taking account of his work commitments, and considering all possibilities. You can also ask them to clarify what would happen if it were not completed, as this is worrying you. You can seek further advice then if you need to.

Here are our FAQs on domestic violence for mothers and for fathers which may be useful to you both.

Please ring our freephone advice helpline on 0808 8010366, Mon to Fri, 9.30 am to 3.00 pm, or post on our parents’ discussion board if you have any further queries.

I hope this is helpful.

With best wishes

Suzie