Family Rights Group | Parents’ Forum

My nephew was taken at birth and my mum was special guardian with myself as fosterer. At the time a psychological report was undertaken and my brother was not allowed custody.

My brother moved in with my mum when my nephew was a toddler and a few years ago my mum passed PR back to my brother but maintained the amount of childcare she provided to my nephew even when they moved into their own property in 2018.

My mum died earlier this year and my brother has spiralled since. His violent temper is nothing new, I often had my mum crying to me on the phone and now my 13 yo nephew is the subject of a CIN plan after an allegation of assault was made against his dad a few months ago which was investigated and decided to be a one-off. Bullying at school hasnt helped but for various reasons my nephew is self-harming and also threatened suicide.

His dad is good at masking his behaviour and can come across as confident and well-adjusted but in fact has a number of mental health issues. Both my mum and myself have supported (in hindsight enabled) my brother in some of those including bailing him out financially, cleaning him up after a fight etc. Those mental health issues are listed in the psychological report from 2012 including his violent behaviour which he admits to starting fights and stabbing people, his aggressive temper (midwives refused to attend the property), his drug and alcohol abuse and his inability to see that he has mental health issues by refusing therapy when offerred many times.

The social worker wanted me to become kinship carer but that wouldnt help my nephew as my brother would still be emotionally manipulating him as he would have PR. My brother has convinced the social worker that he isnt the issue and that I am malicious. I have spoken to the social worker at length and now as i wont become Kinship foster the social worker wont engage with me. I messaged him and asked him to look at the report giving him the reference number/date etc and he said he didnt even know it existed and probably wasnt relevant. It is relevant as it shows a pattern of behaviour which he will see if he finds it.

How can i get the social worker to get access to that report? I have a copy of it, can i give him a copy or am i breaking any confidentiality laws?

thanks, I am genuinely worried.

Hi Worried Aunt,

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Dear Worried Aunt

Thank you for your post and welcome to the discussion board. My name is Suzie, I am an online adviser and will be replying to you today. I will reply to you on the parents forum as this is were you have posted but please join the kinship forum for any future posts.

I am sorry to hear of your situation, it must be a stressful and difficult time for you. Your nephew was removed at birth from his parents’ due to neglect. You cared for him for a period as a kinship foster carer then subsequently your mother sought a special guardianship order. Thereafter, full parental responsibility was passed back to your brother when your nephew was a toddler. You brother and nephew moved into their own property and your mother continued to provide a high level of support. Your mother passed away early this year, and you say since then your brother’s mental health and behaviours have ‘spiralled.’

Your nephew is subject to a child in need plan following an allegation that his father assaulted him. Your nephew is also being bullied at school, he is self harming and has threatened suicide. An assessment was completed by children’s services which resulted in a child in need plan being put into place.

You have raised concerns with children’s services regarding your brother’s mental health. Further, you have informed the social worker of a psychological assessment that was completed in 2012 (presumably during care proceedings). The social worker said they were unaware of the report and said they did not think it would be relevant today. You say the social worker is not listening to you, is no longer engaging with you or taking your concerns seriously. You declined to be assessed as a kinship carer for your nephew due to your current and pass relationship with your brother and feel this is why the social worker is taking this stance.

Giving your brother’s issues and behaviours you think he is hoodwinking the social worker. You are seeking advice and guidance in this respect and want to know whether you would be breaking confidentiality law if you provided the social worker with a copy of the psychological assessment.

You do not say how you obtained the assessment and whether it was part of any care proceedings. If the assessment was part of care proceedings, then you would need permission from all parties to share the report. However, you do not need to go down this route if it was because children’s services will have a copy of the report on their system.

The social worker has a point when they say the report may not be relevant today. It was carried out over ten years ago and since then the child was returned to your brother’s care. Presumably, an assessment (including risk) was completed when your nephew was returned to his father’s care which may supersede this report.

I think it would be a good idea to write to the social worker and to copy in their team manager to raise your concerns and to include reference to the assessment. To ask for a written response and depending on the outcome of this you may wish to take the matter further. I have added HERE information and guidance regarding the complaints process.

It may be useful to consider a family group conference (FGC). This is something you can discuss with the social worker and or team manager and you may wish to include in your letter to them. An FGC is a decision making meeting in which a child’s wider family network makes a plan about the future arrangements for the child, which will ensure that the child is
safe and their well-being is promoted. FGC’s are intended as a respectful and empowering process in which parents’ children and members of the wider family are given clear information about the agency’s concerns and are asked to produce a plan addressing those concerns by answering specific questions. The referrer is requested to stipulate a ‘bottom line’ to ensure
the family are aware of the next course of action by the local authority if the family are unable to make a safe plan for the child/young person. The focus of the FGC is the child/ young person and promotes a ‘no blame’ ethos, to assist families to look at the current situation and make a plan to move forward, building on the resilience and strengths within the family.

In respect of the lack of engaged from the social worker. From the information you have provided you have been a significant person in your nephew’s life and a supportive sister to your brother, therefore this should not be overlooked because you are no longer prepared to formally care for your nephew. However, you do not hold parental responsibility for your nephew and therefore the social worker does not have a legal duty to keep you informed and updated.

I have added a link HEREto child line. I think it would be a good idea to pass this onto your nephew. This is their freephone number 0800 1111 an they also have an online facility for children to reach out on.

I hope you find this information helpful. If you would like to talk to an adviser at Family Rights Group about your situation, please call the freephone advice line on 0808 801 0366, Mon to Fri, 9.30 am to 3.00 pm. If you prefer, you can post back, use our advice enquiry form or webchat. Please refer to our website for further information.

Best wishes, Suzie