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Ground-breaking report opens the way for adopted children to see their birth family
The charity Family Rights Group warmly welcomes a major new publication by the President of the Family Division of the High Court’s Public Law Working Group on Adoption. The report focuses on bringing children’s familial connections and contact to the heart of the adoption process.
Family Rights Group has played a significant part in informing this key report on the future of adoption. The Working Group drew upon the charity’s legal and practice expertise, and Family Rights Group also convened workshops to enable birth family members to feed in their experiences and views.
The report reflects a growing research evidence-base on the positive advantages to adopted children of maintaining face-to-face contact with their birth family, including brothers and sisters. The report signals a move away from the current situation in which it unusual for the care plan for children who are going to be placed for adoption to propose more than indirect or letterbox contact with birth family members.
The report recommendations look towards processes already employed by courts in Northern Ireland, which see expectations of contact with birth parents and other family members, where safe and in the child’s interests, set with future adopters at an early stage.
Cathy Ashley, Chief Executive of Family Rights Group, said:
“The current position is archaic. Even where a child can’t live within their family, it doesn’t mean that their relatives don’t care about them. The permanent separation between adopted children and their birth family, often leaves children with unanswered questions and a sense of loss, that can last a lifetime.
“All too often we hear from birth parents who are told to keep the annual letterbox contact letters that they are permitted to send to their children ‘factual and light’, and that they cannot even tell the children that they love them.
“The Public Law Working Group report makes clear that when determining whether a child should be placed for adoption, the court should prioritise examining the possible benefits of the child having a continuing relationships with their birth parents, brothers, sisters, grandparents or other family members – where it is safe to do so. This is a hugely important step in modernising adoption processes in England and Wales.”
Angela Frazer Wicks MBE, chair of Trustees at Family Rights Group, said:
“The last words I said to my then five year old son before he and his 14 month old brother were driven away by social workers after the ‘goodbye’ contact visit was ‘I love you, mammy will write really soon.’ I had fought so hard to prove to my local authority that I could protect them from my abusive ex-partner – but sadly, without help, I had ultimately failed. They were being adopted.
“A yearly letter exchange, known as letterbox, was all I had left to hold onto. It was the only thing keeping me going.
“Those letters would go on to change my life. Reading that my children were happy safe and loved enabled me to slowly move forwards. I finally escaped the abuse, met and married my husband and we went on to have a daughter. Those letters then became a way for her to build a relationship with her brothers. For such a young child writing letters was far from ideal. Sadly letterbox broke down when my eldest son became a teenager. I always hoped he would contact us again when he was ready. As the years went on we came to accept that we may never hear from either of the boys ever again.
“Until December 2020 when we received an email that changed all of our lives. My eldest son wanted to contact us. 48 hours later we face-timed and my daughter finally got to speak to her brother. We discovered he had been trying to contact us for years but that my old local authority had mistakenly told him I was a risk and refused to help him. Seeing him struggle, his adopted mother had selflessly stepped in and helped him find me on-line.
“As he lives in Australia we have spent almost four years speaking via video calls. Last month my son and his wife finally travelled to the UK. 20 years 3 months and 14 days on from that awful goodbye we said hello again in person. And my daughter, at the age of 13, finally got to meet her biggest brother. Seeing them together, laughing, joking, playing games, building a real relationship was all I ever could have hoped for and more.
“So often there is a lack of understanding of the importance of post adoption contact and it can be seen as something that only benefits the birth family. I genuinely hope that this report helps to change that. Whilst we must always be aware of, and manage any risk, we should be enabling more families to stay connected – especially siblings. Allowing our children to know they are loved, wanted and missed; enabling them to understand their culture, heritage and identity; and giving them the chance to stay connected to the people they love can only strengthen their sense of self.”
Andy is a member of Family Rights Group’s parents’ panel. His eldest daughter was adopted aged three. He went on to have a new relationship with the woman who is now his wife, and they are now raising their two younger children.
“I need her (my eldest) to know I’ll always want to be her dad and that I fought to keep her right to the end. And I’m still here, waiting. But while I wait, I want to speak up too. I want her to know my wife, her siblings, her family. I feel that the report’s recommendations could help others have what I never did; a proper place in my daughter’s life.”
Ensuring that any direct contact is right for the child, well supported and safe, is essential.
Cathy Ashley, Family Rights Group’s Chief Executive stated:
“Family Rights Group developed the Lifelong LInks approach for children in the care system, working with the child to find and re-establish relationships with relatives and others who care about them. Lifelong Links is well evaluated and proven to lead to improvements in children’s sense of identity and mental wellbeing.
“The charity has now adapted the approach, following extensive consultation with adoptees, adopters, birth family members and practitioners. A pilot with ten adopted young people whose adoptive parents are supportive of the process is due to start this Autumn in England. We are proud to be pioneering this important innovation in the field of adoption.”
Notes to editors:
For further information, please contact our Public Affairs Manager, Jordan Hall on jhall@frg.org.uk.
Useful links:
The Public Law Working Group Adoption Sub-Group: Read the recommendations for best practice in respect of adoption report here.
About Family Rights Group:
The charity’s mission is that children are about to live safely and thrive within their families and to strengthen the family and community ties of children who cannot live at home. For 50 years, Family Rights Group has worked to shape the child welfare and family justice systems to make that a reality.
We are a leading specialist charity, uniquely combining legal and social work expertise, advice giving, policy and campaigning, and direct work with families. Our work includes:
- Running a free specialist advice service which supports parents and kinship carers in England, helping them to understand their rights and options.
- Pioneering innovative child welfare practices including Lifelong Links and family group conferences.
- Legal and policy expertise on kinship care. We service the All Party Parliamentary Group on Kinship Care and the Kinship Care Alliance.
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