loosing my sisters :(

[Emmadubleu]

Hi, I'm Emma, 20 years old, I live in the north east UK.
On October 26th my dad and his girlfriend lost all rights to my two little sisters aged 2 and 4 so they are now up for adoption. I'm absolutely heartbroken I don't know what to do with myself, I am so angry with my dad and his girlfriend for letting this happen and acting like complete children for the last year they have made little effort to get them back as obviously alcohol is more important than their children
Im just wandering from peoples experiences how long can it take for them to get adopted, they don't have any problems or anything but they will be getting adopted together. Also what chance do you think I have of having contact with them when they get adopted, I know its up to the adoptive family. Ive made them a big memory book and wrote them a letter for when they are 18, I just cant believe its actually come to this I know its for the best but its so so hard!

[Robin D]

Hi Emma.

I'm so sorry you find yourself in this position through no fault on your own part. It's clear that you are realistic that its the actions of your father and the children's mother that's been reason for this decision and the two little ones deserve a happy childhood.

Most people here are looking after children from other family members who have frequently put their own needs before those of the children so its something we are sadly all too used to dealing with.

The adoption process can be very fast as 'parallel planning' may mean that potential adopters may already have been identified.

After Adoption are an excellent organisation that may be able to provide support during this very painful time for you.

One approach you might try is write a letter to the adoptive parents, explaining that you would like some form of contact with the children, perhaps the odd photo if not contact, but stressing that you would do nothing to disrupt the placement. Give it to the social worker or send it to the director of childrens services. If you hear nothing, you'll never know if they choose to pass it on, but as an adoptive parents ourselves we would have been much more likely to respond to a personally written letter from a family member, and it would have been useful to speak to someone who knew what had gone before so to speak.

Best wishes .... Robin