Final court hearing

[Minnie]

The final hearing is this week, it appears to be stack against me getting my girls home. The local authority and guardian are recommending that girls should be with their father and psychologist is recommending me. The Guardian's decision is knife edge as she said that their father as shown descalation techniques such as distraction and I haven't.
The girls haven't lived with him for 4 years and he has shown little interest in them. He didn't go to parents evening,hospital appointments and rarely did anything for them. it hasn't them from a prolonged period of time such as weekends and holidays. He wasn't involved with them in the two years prior to him leaving,he pretty much only lived in the house. He has been domestically abusive to myself and oldest daughter. Emotionally and psychologically in drove me into the ground,I have had to pick up pieces for myself whilst caring for my girls. I have hidden my struggles away from the girls. He hasn't hidden anything, he has behaved badly,he has been verbally aggressive and at times physically. He has spoken about me in a degoratory manner in front of children whilst on a contact visit. The domestic abuse has been described as a volatile relationship as the social worker hasn't believe that I was domestically abuse and neither has the Guardian.
The Guardian in recent weeks has been out to see the children's father,the children but not myself. The solicitor said I should have seen more of her.
My girls wishes are to come back to me and have contact with their father.
The statements from father have slated me and no mention of the girls. My statements have been balanced and the girls have been at the forefront for me.
My oldest told me at last week contact that she wanted live me and that she didn't want to live with her father. She has said from day one that she wants to be back with me and that hasn't changed. The girls views are been ignored and making my oldest daughter sad,she has told her best friend and she looks sad.
The judge said at IRH that she wasn't convinced that with either could parent my youngest daughter,along with 2 experience foster carers. She said that we(individually) are going to have to convince her that we have changed since they were accommodated. I feel I have.
Has anyone got their children with the odds stacked against them?

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Hi Minnie,

I am sorry to hear about the local authority and the guardian’s position -both want your girls to move to their fathers.

In the end, it will be up to the judge to make the final decision having considered all the evidence, unless all the parties agree. As you have said, you have changed a lot and sought the support that you needed so the judge should recognise the efforts you have made.

At this late stage, the best thing you can do is work very closely with your solicitor.

If the court does find in favour of the girls moving to dad, you need to ensure that you are clear about what contact you will be having and whether there will be any support in enable contact to happen.

Good luck Minnie. I hope things go well.

Suzie

[Minnie]

Hi

I was advised today to agree with the decision to go with their dad as the barrister thought I would lose in court and take myself out of the equation forever getting the girls back into my care. I was also told that this way I could get a decent amount of contact which I did get as a starting point. I'm getting 3 hours week supervised for now. I'm told this good as it could be far less. The barrister also thought the children's father is likely to fail as he was only just above me in the opinion given by the Guardian. My daughter's behaviour is so difficult and he has no experience of this.