Advise needed ASAP - Driving me insane

[Hopeful]

I posted some weeks ago, brief overview of issue. An incident happened between my husband and sister when they were growing up, he wasn’t punished for it until 16 years later. After his punishment he was deemed low risk dew to mitigating circumstances and allowed to return home to me and our 5 year old daughter with no restrictions apart from being on the offenders list for 10 years and even then he was only deemed as needing a yearly visit. We have gone on to live a good family life and brought up two daughters who are oblivious of the past and would like to keep it that way. Every family have skeletons.

Fast forward 16 years, we have over the years built a relationship up with his sister. She (his sister) started a procedure to foster a child she knew, however, at the initial meeting they delved into the history of the family. Within this meeting it was disclosed that she was now talking to her brother and that his daughters don’t know about the past and we now have a granddaughter.

Apparently, this may cause a safeguarding issue and they may want to disclose the information to my eldest daughter and get her to sign something to say she won’t leave her daughter alone with her dad. Can I mention at this point I was never once asked to sign anything 16 years ago as he was deemed low risk and was told after the meeting they held by the social worker ‘Go home and get on with the rest of your life’.

It is still up in the air if they are going to come out and visit us, but they have indicated to his sister that this is a consideration and has been reported so. So my questions is before they do, can they just open up a case after 16 years when nothing has prompted them to apart from an initial fostering meeting (which is now not happening). Can they force me to tell my daughter after being told 16 years ago that we would never have to! Is it in my rights to ask are they looking at other cases of 16 years ago and checking to see if any low risk offenders have gone on to have grand-kids? Will they come knocking in another 20 years when my granddaughter has kids? Please let me know what my rights are before I speak to them.

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear Hopeful

Thank you for your further post. I do not know if you acted on the advice given in my previous response to you regarding asking children services to explain whether they are carrying out any investigation into your family, the framework for this, and how it will be conducted.

It is difficult to advise you based on what your sister in law is telling you. There are separate issues here, she is applying to become a foster carer so has to rely on the advice she receives from the person assessing as to what is required of her. In relation to your adult daughter, if children services have concerns regarding her young child, then it is for them to discuss their concerns with her as an adult and the mother of her own child.

In your own circumstances, you will need to know the concerns that children services have regarding your daughter and or your husband in relation to safeguarding/risk, so you are able to make an informed decision.

Whether or not children services have had reason to look again at the papers relating to your husband is unknown at the moment and only they are able to explain any concerns they have now regarding your husband and/or any further investigation/assessment they might consider carrying out at this time.

Children services cannot force you to do anything but what they ask you to do will depend on the circumstances and possible outcomes before you can decide how to deal with the situation. Please do read the advice sheet relating to child protection procedures previously sent to you. You could also consider making contact with the Lucy Faithfull Foundation on 0808 100 0900. This organisation provides advice in respect sex abuse issues.

I reiterate that if you want to know how your family is going to be affected you need to ask children services or wait for a visit when a social worker should explain any concerns children services have regarding your husband in relation to any risk. Children services have a duty to carry out enquiries where they consider there is risk of harm to a child.

Please telephone our free, confidential advice line on 0808 801 0366 should you wish to speak to an adviser. The advice line is open from 9.30 a.m. to 3.00 p.m. Monday to Friday.

I hope this is helpful.

Best wishes

Suzie