Mental health & review meetings

[QuestionMark]

For the past few months on the build up to review meetings (that are on going due to supervision order) my mental health has deteriorated- specifically about a week before the meeting - my anxiety goes through the roof and when it comes to the day, approaching the building makes my legs shake so much I can barely walk. It’s because of the specific social worker involved who removed my children - I relate her to the trauma (a different SW chaired the last meeting and I was fine). They only last about 20 minutes, but I’m worried for sometimes over a week before going because this SW is a bully, and reminds me a lot of my abusive ex. There’s only 3 review meetings left, can I just stop going?

Also, if I got myself anxiety medication, would CS use it against me in the future if I had another baby one day? I want to get help but I’m afraid I’ll be shooting myself in the foot if I do

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear Questionmark

Thank you for your post. I am sorry to hear that you are experiencing anxiety at the moment especially before you attend the review meetings that are held in relation to the Supervision Order for your child.

Do you bring a friend or family member with you for support at the meetings? This might help a little. You can also ask children’s services to make sure that you have a short break or can step outside for a moment if you are feeling particularly anxious during the meeting. Children’s services can offer ‘reasonable adjustments’ to help parents participate in meetings if they have a disability including a mental health vulnerability which impacts on their participation.

Your GP is probably the best person for you to discuss your needs in relation to your anxiety including the option of medication. Getting support should always be seen as a source of strength. Children’s services cannot discriminate against a parent because they have health needs or are prescribed medication by their GP to help them. Many parents have anxiety and this does not prevent them from caring for a child, in most situations. Children’s services will consider how a parent’s health affects their parenting if they are doing an assessment. Looking after yourself and getting any help you need is important so do talk to your GP or other specialist service about what will help you most.

It is best to go to any meetings about your child, if you possibly can, especially so that you can hear what is said and put forward your views. However, if you are unable to attend for whatever reasons you can find alternative ways to contribute (e.g. in writing, by a telephone consultation etc.) and to get feedback following the meeting. If you decide not to attend, do make sure you explain why so that it is not misunderstood.

With best wishes

Suzie

[QuestionMark]

Thank you for the response Suzie, I’m still considering options as I am attending therapy at the moment too. It’s such a shame that so many parents do feel discriminated against because of their mental health, which makes them fear getting help in the future too

[QuestionMark]

Would they used PTSD against a parent?