Social worker allowing ex partner to emotionally abuse my daughter

[A123]

My daughter was removed from my mother last year and placed into long term care her father is currently in prison and has been in/ out most of her life and has never been interested in her he always wanted a son well anyway the guardian pushed for letter box contact as he's in prison till October this year my daughter has never been interested she knows where he is and has never asked for any form of contact well he's been writing since court concluded in July 19 she's not written back well he wrote a letter at some point informing her she has 2 brothers she didn't know about the social worker did not discuss this with her and the latest letter last month he told he was there at her birth and for the 1st year of her life she had phone contact with me on her birthday and told me what was in the letter and sounded confused we have always told her who was there when she was born and have photos ect and I had to tell her that in fact he wasn't there for her birth or the 1st year of her life she sounded confused so once the call ended I messaged her social worker to tell her she was confused her response was there was nothing inappropriate in the letter so I rung explaining it was full of lies he was at the birth or her 1st year I even told her he had rung the Jeremy Kyle show demanding a dna which resulted in him being sent a solicitors letter to which the social workers answer was I wasn't aware of that she could have checked the file or asked me or my mother so she said she would arrange a phone appointment with my x about him lying well his answer was he was outside the hospital (she told my support worker this morning unaware that I know and is ignoring my calls this week) so now he's been told to write another letter with the truth but she believes now that he was actually outside the hospital, I've spoken to my solicitor he does not think there's anything we can do from a legal point but is there anything I can do as she's being emotionally abused she's never met him and he's feeding her lies which I'm afraid will turn her against my family

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear A123

Thank you for your post

From what you write it seems that your solicitor has given you the correct advice about the contents of the letters and the response that the social worker has given to you.

For you to demonstrate that your daughter is being emotionally abused by her father you may need to show that she is distressed rather than confused by the contents of her father’s letters. You may also have to prove that he is deliberately telling her lies rather than relaying his memories of his relationship with you and her around the time of her birth because as you say he was in and out of her life.

However, if your daughter is distressed perhaps you could ask the social worker to arrange for her to have some counselling particularly because she has been given some information about siblings that she did not know. Young Minds is a charity that may help and NYAS is an advocacy service that may help too. Your daughter may also benefit from an independent visitor, here is some information about this.

Best wishes

Suzie