Social Worker Core Assessment due to oh on SO

[fleur]

Hi,

Heads a bit all over the place at the moment as totally new to all this, my oh is currently serving 5 1/2 months custodial (will be on licence until september) and is due to be released on 14/02. We'd only been together a short while when he was sentanced (I had no knowlege) and completely threw me as i'd fallen head over heels. He has been charged with sexual contact with a family member, I know how that sounds even as i'm writing it, though she wasn't actually related, it's complicated. OH has explained but I will be reading the case file myself on his release/

I have viisted him several times as had a million and one questions, exchange letters and receive calls from him. His probabtion worker also contacts me to update on meetings etc, and made me aware that he would have to refer to social services due to my daughter (4years), I was told that i'd receive a call and someone would come to the house, assess my abiilty to "protect" her and more than likely ask me to sign a form confirming no unsupervised contact. I have made it clear to oh and his probation worker that I haven't decided what is going to happen yet, I will be reading the full case file with OH when he's out as need to know all the facts before we can even think of moving forward.

However, the visit I received yesterday has scared me tbh. I explained when she telephoned that I wouldn't be able to discuss anything in front of my daughter as she has no knowledge of oh and that's how it would remain until i've decided. Told me due to the short timescale she had to see her on her first visit, which i agreed.

When she arrived she asked a number of questions about my daughter - school, gp, nursery, when did she last visit opticians/dentist and frowned when I advised she hadn't been. Advised that due to the seriousness of why she's been asked to assess it needed to be referred straight to a core assessment. She then asked me to sign a form and explained briefly that she'd be writing to her gp, health visitior, nursery and school about my daughter and then asked to see her room. Arranged to come again in a week to take further details from me about my family - enquiring as to how many children etc. Again I couldn't really ask questions as my daughter picks up on everything.

This is really concerning me now, is this what normally happens? I mean i've told the probation worker that I didn't know if we would continue a relationship when oh is out, if I did, it would be several months minimum to ensure that things would work before I would even consider introducing him to my daughter. And would of course discuss with her father prior to this aswell.

Another question i hope someone could help with, is will this now be marked down somewhere forever? As having ss involvement - even if I decide that things aren't going to work and oh and daughter never meet?

One thing, that I think is a positive, is the fact that oh daughter (12yrs) has been assessed and the case has been closed with no restrictions.(I had to tell the lady about his daughter - she wasn't aware!)

Hope this makes sense and someone can help!

Thank you
xx

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Hi Fleur

Welcome to the board.

Sorry to hear you are having such a difficult time with regards to the current Children’s Services involvement.

On a positive note, it seems that you have been fully cooperative with the core assessment they are conducting in relation to your partner, who is now serving a custodial sentence for a sexual offence on a family member.

In your post, you say that he has been convicted for what appears to be a serious crime, but not the exact nature of the offence, or the age of the victim. Is it fair to assume they were an unrelated minor? I appreciate you have said it is a complicated matter, and were taken by surprise (over a short period) in this situation.

To your credit, you appear to be keeping an open mind about your commitment to someone who is a relative stranger to you. That said he was also dishonest by not informing you about the offence, and his involvement in it.

For instance, you have said you want to familiarise yourself with the full details of the case file on your partner’s release (next month). Neither do you have plans to introduce him to your four year old daughter, until you have made your mind up about the status of your relationship. Furthermore, that his probation officer is keeping your informed, and aware of your position. This is a completely sensible approach to take under the circumstances.

The difficulty is, (regardless of data protection issues), and sharing of information without his written consent, without you being given more details about the crime, you could find yourself at a disadvantage in the child protection process. This is because you may struggle to make an informed decision about protecting your child, until shortly before your partner’s release date (14/02), which is only three weeks away.

Therefore, I would consider writing to the social worker, asking them to provide you with as much information as possible about how your partner’s criminal activity, could place your daughter at risk. Because once you are more aware, you can then make an informed decision about your options, you may find you need to take protective measures in order to keep her safe, from the possibility of any future offending.

Let the social work team know (as part of the core assessment) that to date you have been, and wish to continue to fully cooperate with their recommendations for advice and family support, and would consider entering into a written agreement (subject to obtaining legal advice about the contents and implications of signing this), in order to keep her safe.

In your discussions with Children's Services, ask them for dates when the core assessment, or any risk assessment they may be completing, so you have time to make your decision after giving it some careful thought.

Should you wish to discuss your situation in more detail, please contact our advice line on 0808 801 0366 Monday to Friday 09.30 to 03.30 pm.

Best Wishes


Suzie

[fleur]

The charge was sexual contact with a family member, but she wasn't a blood family member. She was the daughter of a woman he'd previously been in a relationship with, classed as his step daughter. Her mother and him had finished a while before he got together with the girl, in a relationship for a year before this happened. The relationship was from when she was 16-17.

I called the court myself when I initially found out and they told me the charges but I can't remember them all now, I know if that's what the ss has read why she is very concerned - girl had made allegations from 8yrs on (prior to relationship with oh and her mother) oh was found guilty on the charges he pleaded guilty to, relationship with a family member as this was true as such.

All his family have supported him through this, along with mother of his daughter. Which has in a way reassured me about him. Minds split constantly.

The dishonesty is another major aspect, which I'm not sure can be repaired. I've had dozens of letters explaining everything and have in turn explained exactly what he's done to me etc. I won't know for definite until he's out I think.

His mother has the full case file, however I'd put off going to get it until he was out, so I could discuss with him further aswell. Talking in person results in him in tears, which with time constraints of a visit isn't the best. I can ask her for a copy and think I will, as that's something I've worried about. If I'm asked questions about the charges and cannot answer fully.

I've had a call from oh tonight and discussed everything more, he's happy for me to contact anyone n everyone as states he's nothing to hide n has told me all.

Would I be able to call and ask her instead or does it need to be in writing? Oh mother has advised the ss who assessed his daughter didn't have the final copy, so keen to know what this ss has.

The social worker told me she had 35 days to complete the core assessment, on 4th she will be gathering more info from me about my family it seems and there is a mappa meeting scheduled for 12th Feb which she is attending.

Thank you so much for your help, it's been difficult to find where to turn xx

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Hi Fleur

Thanks for the helpful update.

Ideally, your partner would put his consent to share information in writing to his Offender Supervisor (attached to the prison), copying the Probation Officer and the Social Worker into any correspondence.

This would then allow the professional network to be able to progress any information sharing, formally, and any key information could be progressed and reflected in the core assessment. Rather than you compromising your own position, particularly as you are unsure about the status of your relationship, at this point.

Time is clearly limited, so it would be helpful for the Multi Agency Public Protection Arrangements meeting on 12th February to be able to make plans, and progress the risk assessment process, prior to your partner's release. Is his earliest release date on 14th February, so yet to be confirmed?

Well done for continuing to cooperate with the assessment.

I hope this helps.

Best Wishes


Suzie

[fleur]

Thank you, i'll let him know when he calls however he's only seen his offender supervisor once since he's been in there and despite putting in an app three times this month he still hasn't had any joy. There doesn't seem to be much efficiency as he had not been told about the mappa meeting held in december/outcome - his external probation worker contacted me to inform and I inturn updated oh.

I'm not sure what you mean sorry by "This would then allow the professional network to be able to progress any information sharing, formally, and any key information could be progressed and reflected in the core assessment. Rather than you compromising your own position, particularly as you are unsure about the status of your relationship, at this point."

Everything seems to be done last minute, the date of the mappa meeting especially with it's just two days before his release date. He was sentanced to 12months, but is being released a bit earlier as had 14days remand taken off which is why it's 5 1/2 custodial. I believe he had this confirmed in writing in a letter after sentancing.

Thanks again

[fleur]

I've spoken to the social worker today, she's advised that she cannot discuss the specific details due to confidentiality but when she comes out to visit on 4th I will have to explain how much i know about what's happened and she will provide more details if there is something that I haven't covered/not aware of.

She's also advised that this is a long process, with the assessment being carried out over 7 weeks. It will be at the end that she will decide but also added that oh will not be allowed contact with anyone under the age of 18 regardless and the additional restrictions will be covered in the mappa meeting.

I didn't want to ask any further questions as she didn't seem to appreciate me asking further questions, advised she will discuss on 4th. However, how is it possible for a case to be closed with his daughter being allowed unrestricted contact yet the sw assessing me is saying no contact with under 18?!

Thank you

**I have called the number you gave but it's said there isn't an advisor avaliable**

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Hi Fleur

Thanks for the updated information.

Sorry if I confused you in any way.

What I suppose I meant to say was that it would be to your advantage, if the professionals network have held regular meetings, to plan how to keep your child safe. Then they can be held collectively responsible for decision making, or failings in any plans being made. This way your partner is not relying solely on you to know what is going on, but on information received from the responsible professionals.

This can then act as a safety net for you, so that you are covered, particularly if you continue to have concerns about professional communications with your partner. These meetings can then be minuted, so that a documented record of any key updates and updated information can be shared in a formal setting.

The main thing I recommend you do is to remain patient and continue to cooperate with any assessments, and hopefully you will be more aware of what is being planned by Children's Services when they visit you again on 4th February. I would use that appointment to raise any further queries you may have ie in relation to your partner's contact with his other child.

Although the process may appear frustrating at this time, but that is not that long to wait, in the scheme of things, particularly if it results in a positive outcome for you and your child.

I am not sure if you have been able to get through to the advice line. Although it is an extremely busy service, it is worth persevering and giving it another try, if you do not get through at the first attempt.

I hope this helps.

Best Wishes


Suzie