Social worker

[Fiolki667]

Hello, the last situation is very stressful for me. I got out of a violent relationship. The police took my ex away. He had a restraining order. After a few months I withdrew the restraining order asking the social worker how she saw it. There was no objection. We live separately. A child in need plan was introduced. She said that they can't tell me what to do but they don't recommend meetings with children.I accepted.But she suggested that meet at the contact center. One day I was very late to pick up my daughter from nursery. I called the nursery and told her what the situation was. They told me that they don't see any contraindications. So my ex picked up my daughter. I arrived in about 10 minutes. It happened to me twice. The social worker didn't fully explain what I can and can't do. because a few weeks ago she also said that she understands that I am here alone. and sometimes a father's support would be useful ... A few days ago she asked if she could come. She came about this very thing. She informed me that until my ex completes the courses it's not possible. And she gone. Can they make any more decisions? I'm very stressed about it. I can't imagine a day without my children

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear Fiolki667

Welcome to the parents’ discussion forum and thank you for posting.

My name is Suzie, the online adviser at Family Rights Group and I will respond to your post here.

I am sorry that you have found yourself in this distressing situation following the breakdown of your relationship with your daughter’s father. Children’s services is involved and your daughter is on a child in need plan. Domestic abuse is a very concerning issue for children’s services because of the impact it has on children’s emotional wellbeing. I have added information about domestic abuse where children’s services is involved.

A recommendation was made that your ex-partner could not see your daughter on his own. There have been two occasions where this has happened, and you have now met with the social worker who has told you that until your partner completes the courses he is not to be with children.

What is being asked of you now are recommendations from children’s services as a safeguarding measure. It is correct that you cannot be told what to do by children’s services but if they make a recommendation and this is ignored or not followed, then the case could be escalated from child in need which you agreed to as it is voluntary to child protection which is not. Here in information about child in need child in need and child protection

From your it seems you have not been clear about what you can and cannot do but it seems the social worker has now explained this. If you are still unclear, then I suggest you ask the social worker to put the expectations in writing, so you are clear.

I mentioned child protection above, this does not mean your children would be removed from your care but failing to keep to a child protection plan could lead to more serious action from children’s services which might involve them applying to the court so they can share parental responsibility for your children. This would then give them the right to make decisions about your children including where they live.

It is important to work well with the social worker and this guide to working with social workers might be helpful to you. Engaging and working well with children’s services is the way to get the best outcome for your family.

Hope this is helpful, but should you wish to speak with one of our experienced advisers you can telephone our advice line on 0808 801 0366. The advice line is open from 9.30am to 3.00pm Monday to Friday (excluding Bank Holidays).

Best wishes

Suzie