Unborn grandchild

[RL2026]

My son and his girlfriend are currently undergoing their pre-birth assessment and have just completed their third meeting. They have now been informed that a conference meeting will be held.
​There are two main areas of concern that we believe need to be viewed with full context:
​The Girlfriend’s History: It is acknowledged that she has had a previous child removed.
​My Son’s Past Offence: My son pleaded guilty to sending inappropriate images of an ex-girlfriend when he was 17. However, the prosecution was delayed until he was 18. Crucially, the court and police did not consider the significant mitigation: he was a victim of a targeted assault by that same ex-girlfriend and her new partner in a secluded park, resulting in a head injury. which I was unaware of at the time.
​The police failed in their duty of care regarding the assault against my son. That led him to send inappropriate photos through Snapchat which gives people that.The Medium: The photos were shared via Snapchat, a platform specifically designed around the "disappearing" nature of messages.
At 17, his understanding was that these images would be automatically deleted after viewing. This demonstrates a lack of malicious intent to create a permanent or public record, rather than a deliberate attempt to distribute harmful content.
​ It highlights a lack of maturity regarding digital footprints, rather than a predatory pattern.
This unborn child is my first grandchild. Is there any support as this is my first involvement with social services as a grandparent is there any support groups as my grandchild could be adopted.

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear RL2026

Thank you for your post.

My name is Suzie, Family Rights Group online adviser and I will respond to your post. You will see that a change has been made to your original username. It may not be your actual name but to ensure confidentiality it was considered appropriate to make the change.

You have posted on the parents’ forum, and I will respond to you here but please join the kinship carers forum. dedicated space that would be much better suited for your situation: The Kinship Carers Forum This forum is specifically for family members and friends (like grandparents) who are raising or looking out for children when parents cannot.

I am sorry that due to their history your son and his girlfriend have to be involved with children’s services (the new name for social services) regarding their unborn baby.

Whilst I understand your views regarding your son’s situation, the points you have stated should be considered as mitigating circumstances are not what children’s services would be concerned with in their safeguarding role for your unborn grandchild. They have completed the pre-birth assessment, and the recommendation is that the unborn baby should be on a child protection plan. Here are links relating to pre-birth assessment and child protection.

The fact that the mother to be had a child removed before means that children’s services would be involved. It is not clear if your son was convicted of the offence or if he was placed on the Sex Offenders register. The assessment of the parents to be should consider how they are now not only the history. It will also depend on the concerns they might have about them being able to safely parent the baby either together or separately.

You ask specifically about what support for grandparents in this situation. If you or any other family can care for your grandchild, then you can ask to be assessed as a possible long-term carer if the parents are ruled out.

Children’s services should be asked by the parents to be for a family group conference so family members or friends can work together to plan how they could support the parents or who would be willing to the on long term care for the baby. You can read more about family group conference HERE.

As you mention your grandchild might be adopted, for an adoption to be approved by the court, it would mean there is no other arrangement that could be made for baby either with a family member or friend. The final decision would be the court’s and there would need to be evidence to show that nothing, but adoption would do. It is not an automatic process.

Kinship is an organisation that offer advice and support to grandparents and kinship carers and you can telephone them on 0300 123 7015 Yon can read information on our website about the different kinship care arrangements HERE.

Please do join the kinship carers forum as you will get support from posters who have been in a similar position to yourself who are willing to share their experiences.

Should you wish, you can speak with one of our experienced advisers by telephoning our free confidential advice line on 0808 801 0366. The advice line is open from 9.30am to 3.00pm Monday to Friday (excluding Bank Holidays)

Hope you will find this information useful.

Best wishes

Suzie