Risk assessment now in question and social want a CiN plan

[Scaredand confused]

So things moved along. Judge agreed to carrying along with 50/50 and overnights with supervision and for social to do a proportionate assessment on how things are implemented. Social worker is newly qualified but seemed nice at first….
Spoke with the kids. Step daughter anxious because social worker kept asking her the same questions so she thought she was giving the wrong answers. Reassured no wrong answers just maybe she was giving different options to check understanding. She seemed happy. I shared this with social worker so she could be mindful when speaking with them next. Spoke to them at Mother’s house next. SD returned really upset- are we splitting up? Was used as example to “test” how they feel about unsupervised time with dad. I tried communicating with the social worker ahead of was avoidant and then when she did answer after I stressed the emotional harm her avoidance was doing she was utterly nasty and said the children do not feel safe alone with their father. We disagree entirely given they are the ones who have been asking to do things with him. She then accused us of coaching due to SD being anxious she had said the wrong things. I pointed out I don’t even know what the questions were and reassured her that she couldn’t do wrong. I’ve made a complaint and waiting for manager. The social worker wants to put us on a CiN plan but won’t give us any actual information other than she wants to assess the specialist risk assessment done by Lucy faithful and how it’s implemented (literally what she was meant to be doing now!) she is pushing me to agree and even though we only actually got this assessment document a couple of hours ago is pushing us to agree ahead of court to the plan (which she has not shown us) she is being incredibly difficult and every aspect is met with utter extremes despite 4 years of positive contact, the children constantly telling her I am their safe person and requesting to do certain activities unsupervised. Within the last month I had a medical emergency and was not able to drive. We agreed with the mother that the journeys to and from school could be unsupervised for this period and agreed safety protocols which I also discussed with Lucy faithful for support. I informed the social worker prior to this commencing but today on her visit she has suddenly jumped on this and said she wasn’t aware!! I even pointed out the in depth discussion we had about the plans and protocols and what I would do in her many what ifs scenarios.
I do not feel safe with this person she has a clear agenda and no intentions of supporting things forward. She is causing emotional harm to the children. Their mother is still in support and agreement. Please help me to make sure this is viewed and managed properly. 4 years with only positive contact, everything moved forward in agreement with the children and mother. We are not asking for significant changes just permission for occasional events and short journeys or trips to shops etc. all other periods would remain as they are. I feel the social worker has a distinct issue with us and does not want to help us move forward

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear Scaredandconfused

Thank you for your post, my name is Suzie, I am an online adviser at Family Rights Group and will be replying to you today.

From the information provided you are going through private law proceedings with your ex-partner. The Judge has agreed for the current plan to continue as 50/50 shared care, supervised. This includes overnight staying contact. The Judge ordered the social worker to complete a proportionate assessment to explore how matters were progressing and how the safety plan was being implemented.

You have some concerns about the social workers approach to the assessment and the impact this having on your children. You have tried to reassure you children that there is no ‘wrong answers’ after one child became anxious and worried. The social worker has raised concerns about your approach and says you and their mother are coaching the children to say certain things. You dispute this and have made a complaint to the manage alongside the general conduct of the social worker towards you and your family. You are awaiting their response.

You say the social worker wants children’s services to support the children via a child in need plan . They are seeking your agreement to this, but you have yet to see the assessment they have/are completing when coming to this conclusion. Further, you have not had time to digest the information from the specialist Lucy Faithfull Foundation assessment.

At Family Rights Group we provided information and guidance when children’s services are involved in family life or when a family wishes for them to be. We do not provide information and guidance within private law proceedings. We are not funded to do so. A good source for information and guidance regarding private law proceeding is an organisation called Child Law Advice .

When children’s services are asked to complete an assessment within private law proceedings they will usually manage this within the framework of a child in need plan. Child in need plans are voluntary, not mandatory therefore the social worker will need your consent for your children to be placed on one. Please see the link above for further information and guidance regarding this process.

I would advise you to ask for a copy of the completed plan before deciding whether to consent to one being put in place. Further, I would advise you to carefully consider the Lucy Faithful Foundation assessment. Given the nature of the assessment you will need some time to read and digest the information. I suggest you go back to the social worker with a reasonable timeframe to do this.
It is advisable to wait for the outcome of your complaint to the manager before deciding your next steps (if any). Depending on the outcome you may wish to take the matter further. I have added HERE a link to our information and guidance regarding the complaints process which you may find helpful.

Also, I have added HERE a link to a document we have created for parents and carers who are working with social workers. This sets out how to work well with them and what you may wish to consider when things are not going so well. Please do take a look.

I hope the information provided is of help to you. Please post again if you have any further queries or you can call our free, confidential adviceline on 0808 801 0366 (Monday to Friday, 9:30am – 3pm). We also have a webchat which is currently open on Monday and Thursday afternoons.

Best wishes, Suzie