Help..just completed Core Assessment..unprepared and scared

[Nonjudgemental]

Hi

Would really like some advice on the possible next steps after my husband and I recently completed a Core Assessment with a social worker concerned about our 9 year old son.

Children's Services have become involved after a drunken domestic argument between my husband and I involved the police. Our son was not at home at the time.

The Police referred the incident to CS whom contacted us by letter to arrange an Assessment. This took place on Friday and we both felt totally unprepared for the depth of the assessment and the steps that CS are now taking to complete it.

Much time was spent discussing our backgrounds, our son and our circumstances. We were very compliant and open about our situation and the steps we have taken personally (i.e. counselling) to avoid any further impact to us as a couple and to avoid potential impact to our son.

We have never been involved with CP before. Unfortunately my husband had a conviction of GBH which was spent over 20 years ago and has had no further convictions since then however the social worker spent much time discussing this and it felt as though this conviction may have been yesterday for all she cared.

We have been informed that CP will also contact our sons school as well as our GP to do welfare checks. An assessment with our son has also been arranged for next week.

My question is how far is this likely to go? We both continue with our counselling and have even agreed to partake in alcohol counselling at the social workers request. Our son is a very happy and well adjusted child but has been diagnosed with ASD which makes us worry about him within a one to one assessment with a stranger.

This whole experience has left us totally sick with worry; and struggling to see a positive likely outcome. It would be really great to hear of similar situations and their outcomes. Is it likely a conference will follow? Is it possible we will be put on a protection plan?

Thanks in advance.
N

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear Nonjudgemental

My name is Suzie, one of the Family Rights Group online advisers.

Sorry to hear that you are finding the current Children’s Services involvement distressing and frustrating.

It seems that you are already showing that you have accepted the need to make some changes by engaging with alcohol, relationship counselling and other family supports, so that professionals can see that you are doing everything possible to show that you are taking steps to keep your child safe.

This willingness to engage with the core assessment, in the way you have been doing, shows the social worker that you are taking the matter seriously, but being open to receive support to prevent the same thing happening in future.

It is normal practice for your child to be seen alone, as the assessment needs to show what attempts have been made to obtain their views. If you feel strongly that due to their special needs, they would find a meeting with a stranger, distressing or overwhelming, perhaps you could agree to them being seen in school, with a member of staff that is familiar to them.

With regards your husband’s conviction for a GBH offence that took place many years ago, this will be see as relevant information, in view of the recent domestic violence that took place in your home. The incident will need to be considered in terms of how it relates to the risk he presents to your son, and will form part of the assessing social worker’s recommendations along with the following:-

• his age at the time, the circumstances and his attitude to this offence
• the fact that he has not been involved in any further offending of a similar nature
• is seeking support at the current time
• his willingness to have an up to date risk assessment

will all be important factors that will be taken into account.

Once all the information is received from the other agencies and the core assessment is completed, it is possible that the social worker will recommend a further period of support/ monitoring under, perhaps under a child in need (or family support) plan.

Alternatively, they may feel that a multi agency child protection conference is required to see if a child protection plan is necessary as a way forward to keep your son safe.

If either you or your husband wish to speak to an adviser about your situation, please contact our advice line on 0808 801 0366 Monday to Friday 09.30 am to 03.00 pm.

Best wishes


Suzie

[Nonjudgemental]

I just wanted to post an update on our situation with the hope that it may give others the strength to believe in a positive outcome.

The Core Assessment has now been completed. The social worker assessed our son last week on his own to review whether he was being negatively impacted by his home environment.

I'd been worrying myself sick about this assessment for weeks; our son has ASD and I was concerned that some of his symptoms could make him seem distant or removed and that could possibly be misread as distress or unhappiness.

We were so relieved that he demonstrated that he is the happy little boy that we know him to be and that he is secure and contented living with us. He's shown no awareness of the problems that my husband and I may have had in the past and proved to the social worker that he is well adjusted and bright.

No further action will be taken; and my god it's such a relief!!! We were told that this was because we have demonstrated that we have taken the situation seriously by both going to alcohol and relationship counselling and being open to advice and ways to improve our lives as a family. At times its been difficult to be calm and non-defensive about the intrusion into our lives, but I think staying reasoned and co-operative has helped us hugely.

I wanted to share our story with others because this has demonstrated to us how easily negative aspects in your own life can snowball and lead to mistakes and misjudged behaviour that could impact on your children. That doesn't necessarily mean you are bad parent or are unable to love and care for your children properly but we all at times need help to regain control and balance and at times its easy to lose sight of that.

It has made us see that not dealing with particular personal issues can lead to social services being involved in and impacting on your life when you have a child. This experience has been a huge wake up call for us both. I can safely say I've never felt so scared in the whole of my life.

I appreciate that many people on this site have had really awful and distressing experiences and I'm quite sure that the fair treatment of families in these situations varies from social worker to social worker which really isn't an acceptable situation.

Just thought this may offer a bit of positive news to others during what can be a really scary and emotionally affecting time.

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear Nonjudgemental

Well done and thank you for returning to share your news with other users of the parents' board. I hope this will motivate and encourage people to believe that positive outcomes are possible for parents going through similar experiences to yourselves with Children's Services.

Best Wishes

Suzie

[ange301126]

Dear non-judgmental, I am pleased to hear you are happy with the way things went and that the core-assessment was done early. I would just like to give your husband and you two pieces of advice for the future.
Firstly, i believe it to be true that criminal convictions from over ten years ago are now spent under the Rehabilitation of Offenders Act. Your husband now has a CLEAN RECORD. He is under no legal obligation to reveal any details of SPENT CONVICTIONS to anyone .If anyone asks, he has a clean record. This is to prevent discrimination when job-hunting and being assessed by councils for various things such as housing, child protection purposes and the like. Neither are the Police permitted to reveal spent convictions without permission from him unless ordered by a court.
Having said that, when a case goes to the family-proceedings court ( yours didn’t), the Local Authority usually ask every parent to give written permission for the Police to give information of spent convictions. If you refuse, they can then apply to the Judge for a court order. It is important to remember that if this ever happens to you, in the interests of fairness and to stop any discrimination, the CS are only supposed to reveal details of any offence specifically related to child abuse to the court or any of the other assessors. Unless it was against a child , GBH twenty years ago cannot be cited against you.
I am pretty sure I am right, maybe Suzie can confirm it.
To end, be warned to keep safe copies of any paperwork you have, such as a letter from the CS which says they are going no further and why, copies of letters from medical or schools used for the assessment also a copy of the assessment if they have given you one. Of course, we all hope that you won’t have any more involvement with the CS but they will come in very useful in the future if they come calling again. Unfortunately their records of events are not always fit for purpose and they may ‘lose’ all or part of yours. You can always bring them out for any future assessment even in three, four or even ten years’ time.
Good luck.

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

I am sorry that I am not in a position to advice about the Rehabilitation of Offenders Act as we do not advise about criminal law. I am worried that the time periods may vary depending on the exact nature of the offence. I suggest that you contact the disclosure and barring service for more information.

Best wishes,

Suzie