Section 47 and child in need meeting

[worriedmumof3]

Hi I have been left in a state after my autistic son went in to school and told them my partner had hurt him, When in actual fact the injury in question was caused by him climbing on our banister which I had informed the school about, But the next day after his father had told him he was no longer aloud to play on his sonic games after his difficult behaviour he lied to his one to one support worker and told her daddy had done it, The school then phoned social services and the police and they made my partner sign a handwritten document saying he wasnt aloud back to the house for th foreseeable future this was may the 1st, They took my son to hospital and the next day demanded he did a video interview even though he protested many times as his autism makes it very hard to be around unfamilliar people and because he knew he had lied I told the on duty social worker he had told me and my mother in law he lied because daddy took away his sega and it made him upset,which feel on completely death ears, To this day I have had one visit from a social worker who has now been assigned to my son where she just took my other childrens details and looked in there bedroom which was all fine, Then she told me we couldnt discuss the supposed incident and my views on it as the police had not yet spoke to me and That my partner was still to stay away from the children even though I have a very happy 3 year old and 6 week old baby and an autistic child that is beside himself because daddy cant come home because of a fib they have all bought into, So I phoned the police yesterday to ask when they were coming to talk to me, to which they replied there not it has been passed to CPS and they are no longer involved, STRANGE as I am always in my house where the alleged assualt happened and my son has been going to school saying I want to tell the truth about what happened , I have also since been informed that my son should have had an autism specialist in the interview with him and for support after, I was wondering if anyone could please give me any advice I feel like they have ripped my family in half and then arent that bothered about sorting this supposed problem and the affect it has had on my family as a whole

[ange301126]

Dear worriedmumof3,

As a matter of fact there is a recent case which is very similar to yours on these forums.Whilst waiting for the FRG advisor advisor,Suzie, to come on line you could spend your time reading the thread, NEED SOME ADVICE PLEASE by ANXIOUS in full.

[worriedmumof3]

Hi thanks I will give it a read I just dont know what to do this has triggered alot of health issues I thought I had conquered such as insomnia and panic disorder and I really could do with the support from my partner all I can think is my poor baby she has been here so shortly and her family life is destroyed because social services cant be bothered to atleast contact me and give me an update on what is happening I am so scared to lose my children it is actually killing me

[Anxious]

Hello worriedmum, i have been through something quite similar to you.. I too had to sign an agreement to say my partner would reside elsewhere until the outcome of the police investigation was over.. this took 6 months and we only received an outcome a couple of weeks ago from the cps and social services only allowed my partner back home last week and our social worker involvement began in November 2013.

I know how scary the situation is as you have no idea what is going on and no one is telling you anything however, you need to keep telling yourself you have done nothing wrong and neither has your partner. Has he got himself a solicitor?

Have you has social services involved before at any time or does you or your partner have any criminal records?

I will give you one piece of advice and that is to cooperate fully with them! Never get angry at them but do ask them questions about how long things will take.. Also never offer them any information only answer questions they ask you but never divulge anything to them because they could use it against you at a later date. They may seem all nice and friendly but do not trust them at all!

I was in a really bad place 6 months ago but it has got better for me.. my children are currently on a child in need plan but i am hoping that by July they will be off this and we will be left alone.

Has anyone taken a statement from your son that he is now changing his story as this is new evidence surely? My partners children lied and then changed their stories and then finally retracted them completely which led to my partner receiving a no further action outcome due to insufficient evidence.

Keep a diary of everything that happens with them and log all incidents with the children e.g. if they fall over put down how it happened. Put dates, times and names!! These things may come in handy later on.

Please try not to worry, i know it is easy to say but i know 100% how you are feeling.
First of all, your partner does not legally have to leave the home as the social workers need to go to court for this to happen however the fact you have cooperated will be in your favour as they will see you understand their views that your partner could be a risk to the children due to the allegation your son has made even though it is not true.

You should also know that they cannot remove your children without a court order and this is not going to happen unless there was something more serious. I doubt one incident is going to be seen as a reason to take your children they would need a lot more than this. If they thought there was a real danger to the children they would have done something by now. Social services do take forever to get things started and done so you will have to be patient. Have you got a solicitor for yourself? Just to give you a bit of advice on the legal side of things.

Also Suzie the FRG advisor should contact you soon and give you some more information she is brilliant and helped me a lot at the start of this whole process. Try and read some of the advice sheets supplied on this site and it will give you a bit more of an idea of the process of social workers involvement and the assessments they do.

Make sure you read my thread NEED SOME ADVICE PLEASE by ANXIOUS because my situation is similar and i have nearly made it through to the end. I have another review meeting in July and that is where im hoping things are going to end as me and my partner have fully cooperated and engaged in all services they have provided and i must admit some of the things they have provided us with have been positive whether or not we actually needed them in the first place.

Good luck with everything!! And keep posting on here because we can all help you through the process. I have found this site amazing when i have been feeling low and everyone's contributions have been fantastic!

Speak soon
Anxious

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Hello worriedmumof3

Welcome to the discussion boards. My name is Suzie and I am an adviser at Family Rights Group.

I can see that you have already received some lovely peer support from Ange and Anxious and I hope that this has been helpful.

Do keep posting to let us know how you are getting on and if you have any other specific questions. You are also welcome to call our free and confidential advice line 0808 801 0366 if you would like to speak to an adviser directly. The line is open Mon- Fri, 9,30am- 3pm.

Best Wishes

Suzie
FRG Adviser

[worriedmumof3]

Hi all thank you so much for your supportive comments really means alot, At the moment I am really trying to suss my sons social worker out I find her really incompetent to say the least She held a child in need meeting at my sons school which she did not inform me about and tried to do it again for the 26th of this month, Luckily my sons educational needs officer informed me of the date and time, I ring her and she is never there, I finally got through to her today after leaving numerous messages for her to lecture me about this written agreement that my partners solicitor asked for a copy of 3 weeks ago which he has still not recieved, I then asked about contact for my partner to which she said she cant sort anything untill the investigation is over, I also informed her my son has told his one to one worker about why he lied and his feelings to which she replied its a police matter??.
I am trying so hard to be courtese to her but she is just utterly unhelpful, My son has been suspended from his school because of the dramatic change in his behaviour since not being able to see his dad,I see it as there doing more damage than good but im only there mother it seems like what I have to say doesnt count.

[Anxious]

Hi worriedmum,

Sorry to hear about the stressful time you are having at the moment..

Has your partner had a risk assessment yet?

The fact there is an ongoing investigation should not matter when it comes to contact as my partner was able to have contact with our children as long as it was supervised by me even though there was an ongoing police investigation..

I think you should ask to speak to the social workers manager and see what they say regarding contact. Even whilst there was an investigation ongoing the social worker was going to allow my partner to have unsupervised contact with the children but luckily before this was sorted the police investigation came back as no further action due to insufficient evidence and he was allowed to come back home.

[worriedmumof3]

Hi Anxious
The social worker has not done any assesments what so ever she is next to useless and her only excuse is the police investigation is ongoing, I think she is just fobbing me off seems to have a busy workload as she is never in the office, Definately considering complaining as we have just been left completely in the dark.

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear worriedmomof3

You may find it helpful to refer to our : complaints advice sheet for help in your situation.

I hope this helps.

Best Wishes

Suzie

[worriedmumof3]

Hi I have a child in need meeting tomorrow hopefully a social woker will be there as I have had still no contact whatsoever not even a letter, I have unsucessfully tried to make a complaint via the team manager no phone back at all disgusted with how they are quick to remove my partner from my childrens life and then not bothered to do anything in 2months they have done nothing I have full support from my health visitor who has no concerns whatsoever all my children are well feed clothed clean and very happy as she says they have completely jumped the gun and dont know what to do so are avoiding me, My partners solicitor has advised him to return home as there has been no communication in 3 weeks betewen himself and them but I am still hesistant as they can always pull the your not protective and we will take steps to safeguard your children card when it suits them DISGUSTING!