Reported to CS re Bruises

[Shaftesbury]

Hi.

My children are currently on a child protection plan because I am in a long-distance relationship with a registered sex offender. We meet up once every two months. The plan is currently ticking over and there's nothing further to report there at the moment.

However, today I received a telephone call from my 3 year old's pre-school to say they are concerned because they have noticed bruising on her body. I knew she had fallen over with her father on Saturday and had grazed her knee and offered this information. However, they asked me to come in to the pre-school, and so this I did.

When I arrived they had drawn on a diagram where the bruising had been observed and told me they had had to inform children's services. Because my children are already on a CPP I became very concerned that I may be accused of harming my child. However, they did say that my 3 year old had already told them she sustained the injuries whilst being out with her father and it was good this tied in with what I had said.

I asked to see my child and she was brought in. I looked for the injuries they had noted down. Her knee graze was now a scab and clearing up. The bruise they had noted on her back was now gone. The only thing left was two small bruises on her thigh. The staff told me they were concerned because they saw these two bruises as "stripes" which could possibly be done by fingers, I guess by somebody grabbing or slapping her.

Later today the social worker came round and looked at my child and also spoke to my older child who backed up what my 3 year old and I had been saying about her falling over when out with her father. However, I am now so worried what will happen next with this information.

I worry that is something like this happens again my parenting ability will be brought into question. Previously I had been proud that Children's Services had reported on what an excellent mother I am. I am so worried that this is the beginning of them changing their views.

Is this sort of observation something I am just going to have to get used to whilst my children remain on the CPP?

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear Shaftesbury

Thank you for posting on Parents’ Discussion Board again.

I am sorry that there has been a slight delay in responding to you. Family Rights Group is a small charity and due to the volume of enquiries we receive it is not always possible to respond as quickly as you or we would like. Additionally, we have had difficulties with our internet connections recently.

You say in your post that you are worried that your parenting ability will be called into question by Children Services because your children are on Child Protection Plans. As they are on the Plans there is an element of monitoring but if the same thing had happened to a child not on a child protection plan, the response would probably have been the same. The school has a safeguarding role for all children and concerns are referred to Children Services as appropriate.

There was a reasonable explanation and one that appears to have been accepted in respect of your daughter. Both she and her older sibling could also explain what happened, it is usually where an injury is unexplained or the explanation given is not consistent with the injury that there will be child protection concerns. I have included a copy of our advice sheet relating to child protection procedures for your further information.

My advice is that you should not worry too much about this incident and it does not mean you are not a good parent. As I have said above, all children are observed whether on a plan or not as all professionals have a safeguarding role for children and can make a referral to Children Services if they have concerns.

Also, the incident occurred whilst your daughter was visiting her father so it was not due to anything you did or failed to do. You should remember that children can have accidents but this is only a problem if it cannot be explained or injuries do not bear out what is said to have happened.

I am sure you are a good mother so do not worry unnecessarily. My advice is that you continue to work with the Child Protection Plan and do what is asked and cooperate and worth with Children Services.

Should you wish to speak to an Adviser, you can telephone our free advice line. The advice line is open from 9.30 a.m. to 3.00 p.m. Monday to Friday.

Best wishes,

Suzie