Child protection services playing games!!

[pwinnylou]

Hi I just wondered if anyone could advice me on what we can do next reguarding our current situation with children services?last February my partner was charged with possessing indecent images of children he recieved a 10 mth custodial sentence however served 5 the rest on licence until December of this year.2 weeks after his arrest we found out we were pregnant with our daughter so obviously social services have been involved the whole time.i have chosen to stay with my partner he is not a bad man..naive at times and he has been honest about everything however due to me sticking by him they feel I cannot protect my daughter.my partner due to his sentence was unable to complete any courses however willing to do them and is currently do 1 to 1 work with his probation officer which he states is being responded to well and my partner is where he should be at this time.the reports children services have written are full of lies and due to my partner not stating what has happened to what is written in reports he is still in denial and apparently grooming me!I have myself have completed psycho educational work and have been deemed a safe carer however because I still stick by my partner due to being a medium risk I have concerns in my parenting assessment.my partner was only released on Christmas Eve and is doing everything he should to rebuild what's happened we are under no ellusion our lives will never be the same again however we will make it as normal as we can for our daughter.when he was inside the social worker bullied him that he was going to a hostel and would never see his child.he is currently residing with his mother 20 mins from our family home and has supervised contact with la twice a wk up until last week also every other Sunday and special occasions supervised by family members which has now been taken off us due to them now thinking he is in denial of his offence.would u let an offender you perceive as extremely high risk spend the day in London with family supervising?I certainly wouldn't.social worker doesn't seem to realise she is affecting the whole family with games and what good is that for our daughter.neitther me or partner now kno what to say to social services as everything is twisted we just feel extremely stuck and don't know where to go next?I have a solicitor involved also which I don't think she likes who makes sure things carry on moving but things on report which states we need to do that ss have yet to do I have apparently asked for them to b done?sick of games now!!help!!

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear pwinnylou

Welcome to the Family Rights Group Parents’ Discussion Forum.

My name is Suzie and I am the online adviser at Family Rights Group.

I am sorry that you are feeling upset and frustrated by the situation you find yourself with Children Services involvement with your family due to what happened with your partner.

Although your partner was convicted and has served part of his sentence in prison and now on licence and working with probation, Children Services is likely to remain concerned about your daughter’s safety in her father’s care. Children Services have a duty to ensure that children are brought up in a safe environment and not at risk of harm. Whilst I appreciate that you may feel strongly that he would not harm your child, Children Services will not share your confidence.

Children Services have to carry out assessments of you and your partner to satisfy themselves that the risk to your daughter is minimised or that there is a manageable risk if you and your partner remain together. I see from your post that your partner is working 1 to 1 with his probation officer but this might not be enough for Children Services who might want to carry out their own risk assessment. Has the social worker informed you and your partner about the risk assessment and how this will be done? If not, I suggest that you ask for this and the timescale in which it will be carried out. Please put your request in writing and keep a copy for yourself.

In your post you say that the reports written by Children Services are all lies. If there are factual inaccuracies in the reports you have read then you should make a note of these and ask for amendment to be made. If the amendments cannot be made, you should ask that what you have written to point out the errors in kept on the file. You can only ask for things to be changed if something you said or did not say is in the report or specifics facts are wrong. If the person writing the report states an opinion, it is unlikely it would be changed.

You say that your partner has not stated what happened and this will be of concern to Children Services as he is not been completely honest and open with them. The fact that he will not say what happened might suggest to Children Services that he still poses a risk as he is not facing up or minimising what he did. Being in denial about his actions is sending the right message. Although you say the probation officer thinks he is at the right place, this might be for him in relation to he has to do, it does not mean necessarily in respect of your daughter.

Children Services are required to help promote contact and your partner is having contact at the moment. Contact is unlikely to be unsupervised and the fact that family is supervising does not suggest that they are doing anything wrong. If anything were to happen to your daughter during the time the family is supervising contact, then it is likely that contact would be stopped and Children Services may well consider what further action they should take to protect your daughter.

In your post you say that it is thought that your partner is grooming you. I do not know why Children Services are taking this view. They do of course have more information about your current circumstances than I do so am not able to give advice on this, except to say, that if they consider you to be a vulnerable person, this might be a cause for their view.

The social worker’s role is to work with a family so, where possible, a child can remain safely cared for by his or her family. It is therefore very important that both you and your partner work cooperatively with the social worker and, if there is a child protection plan, to ensure that you adhere to the plan. Perhaps your partner can think about sharing more of what happened to Children Services. You say that he has been honest about everything so, why is it that he is not speaking openly to the social worker. As stated previously, if he is not open and honest it will be of concerned.

He is said to be medium risk and this may be why Children Services are concerned about his failure to be open about his offence.
Regarding the view that you are not able to protect your daughter, this may be because they consider that you do not show that you are concerned enough about the nature of your partner’s offence and his failure to be fully about it. Children Services may believe that if you are not putting your daughter’s needs first. I suggest that you try to focus on how you would keep your daughter safe and what actions you will take to make sure she remains safe. Try not to minimise the offence as this might be seen as you not wishing to upset your partner rather than accepting the situation and concentrating more on your daughter.

I have included a copy of our advice sheet about child protection procedures for your information.

You may also like to contact the Lucy Faithfull Foundation and their website is here for more information and advice relating to sexual abuse matters.

A copy of our advice sheet about challenging decisions is here for your information.

You can also get advice from Stop it Now on 0808 100 0900

Should you wish to speak to telephone our free confidential advice line on 0808 801 0366. The advice line is open Monday to Friday from 9.30 a.m. to 3.00 p.m.

I hope you will find this helpful.

Best wishes

Suzie