Family Rights Group | Kinship carers’ Forum

Hi
I need some advice, we have had our niece in our care since 2019 under SGO. Her mother was an active drug user and has currently been out of rehabilitation for 1 year, we have always said to her she needs to be consistent in the contact she currently has with her daughter. She has been consistent for the past 4 months making 1 phone calls per week and face to face supervised contact once a month, so we increased the calls to 2 per week and have advised her if she continues being consistent we will increase to 3 calls per week and 2 face to face supervised per month. She isn’t happy with this and wants us to give her unsupervised contact now even tho she has only started making all the calls since October 2024, we have now received a solicitors letter stating she wants to take us to court for unsupervised contact. For the past 5 years we have asked her to be there for her child and begged her to make the contact. We are happy she is now doing it but we don’t want to feel pressured into it when we still don’t fully trust her. The missed contact really effects my niece and causes bad behaviour which we have worked through for 5 years to get her into a better place to then feel all that hard work could go back over as 4 months to us isn’t long enough to be able to make this decision.

I am afraid you cannot stop birth mum from applying for leave to make an application to have it reviewed. However, she would need to show that there has been a significant change in circumstances to get through that first step. The fact that she has asked a solicitor to send a letter gives no indication that even that solicitor thinks there has been a significant change. The solicitor is simply acting on her instructions.

I am of two minds as to whether you should reply to the solicitor setting out your position, or wait until you are invited to mediation or served notice that they are making that application for leave. On one hand, a well versed reply may cause the solicitor to realise the try situation and advise their client accordingly, the downside is that you are putting most of your cards on the table. @Suzie may have a view on that.

You would get an opportunity to object, and as it will then be a contested hearing, the court will probably appoint someone to do a report, into which your concerns should be written down for the court.

I am sure its the last thing you, or indeed your niece, needs but at least with a SGO, there is the extra 'leave' hurdle for a parent to get over. Under the old residence orders etc, parents could, and did, take carers back to court time and time again as I know to my personal cost.

Good luck .... Robin

D1602 wrote: Tue Feb 04, 2025 2:07 pm Hi
I need some advice, we have had our niece in our care since 2019 under SGO. Her mother was an active drug user and has currently been out of rehabilitation for 1 year, we have always said to her she needs to be consistent in the contact she currently has with her daughter. She has been consistent for the past 4 months making 1 phone calls per week and face to face supervised contact once a month, so we increased the calls to 2 per week and have advised her if she continues being consistent we will increase to 3 calls per week and 2 face to face supervised per month. She isn’t happy with this and wants us to give her unsupervised contact now even tho she has only started making all the calls since October 2024, we have now received a solicitors letter stating she wants to take us to court for unsupervised contact. For the past 5 years we have asked her to be there for her child and begged her to make the contact. We are happy she is now doing it but we don’t want to feel pressured into it when we still don’t fully trust her. The missed contact really effects my niece and causes bad behaviour which we have worked through for 5 years to get her into a better place to then feel all that hard work could go back over as 4 months to us isn’t long enough to be able to make this decision.

Dear D1602

Welcome to the kinship carers’ discussion board. Thank you for your post. My name is Suzie. I am Family Rights Group’s online adviser. I am sorry to hear about the current difficult situation.

You have been caring for your niece under a Special Guardianship Order for 5 years. My understanding is that the court left the contact arrangements for your niece to see her mother ‘at your discretion.’ You have always prioritised your niece’s welfare and have promoted contact but asked her mother to be consistent and adhere to the boundaries that you have set. Your niece’s mother has made progress in addressing her substance use, completed rehabilitation and maintained her progress for a year. So, you have acknowledged this and have been working with a phased increase in contact which continues to be supervised. Your niece’s mother is not happy with the current arrangements so has consulted a solicitor who has written to you stating that she intends to go to court to seek unsupervised contact.

You have already had helpful advice and information from another kinship carer, Robin. I just wanted to add to and clarify some points too.

The first thing to say though is that you should not worry unduly. It sounds as if your niece comes first in all your decision-making and that you can evidence how you are promoting her wellbeing by wanting her mother to show that she can maintain consistent contact and her own progress before considering allowing her to see her child unsupervised.

If the SGO was made as part of care proceedings for your niece then children’s services should have assessed your support needs, including in relation to contact between your niece and her mother. So, you could contact the Special Guardianship Support Team to get additional advice and support about this.

It is correct that if a parent wants to make an application to the court for contact (or a change in contact) then that is their right. They would apply for a Child Arrangements Order(CAO) (spend time with). Your niece’s mother would need to offer you mediation first before applying to the court. Please see here for more information about mediation.

I just wanted to note too that a parent does not need the court’s permission to apply for a CAO (for contact); they would need the court’s permission if they were applying for the child to live with them or wanting to apply to end the SGO.

If your niece’s mother does make a court application, then you can respond and put forward your reasons for the current plans which the court will listen to very carefully. You have cared for and provided stability for your niece and what you have proposed is reasonable.

As this area of law is ‘private law’ and therefore outside our remit you may be able to get fuller advice on how to respond or prepare for a court hearing (if it happens) by contacting one of the following organisations:

Child Law Advice. They do have a telephone helpline which you can reach on 0300 330 5480. In addition, they offer helpful information and guidance for parents/carers in your type of situation and have ‘how to’ guides that you can download for around £2 each. Please do check out their website.

Advicenow is a website that helps you find the best information and advice for your legal problems. You can choose from a range of categories, such as divorce and separation, child custody and residence, and more.

Rights of Women. Their family law telephone advice lines can advise you on divorce, cohabitation, parental responsibility and arrangements for children, domestic violence and abuse, finances, and property on relationship breakdown, and more.

Support Through Court provides help and support to people involved in the family court without a lawyer. They do not provide legal advice though.

I hope this is helpful.

If you have further queries that we can help with, please post back, or contact the advice service via one of the following options:

• Our freephone advice line, 0808 8010366, Mon to Fri, 9.30 am to 3.00 pm (except bank holidays)
• Our advice enquiry form
• Our webchat

Best wishes

Suzie