1984mummy wrote: Sat Dec 07, 2024 12:42 pm
Hi what happens if one parent will not do the working together agreement I'm following mine but my bf refuses to as doesn't think it's nessesary. Which it isn't but I've done fighting them on this and just want them to stop pestering us. My boyfriend doesn't live with me and our daughter.
Dear 1984mummy
Welcome to the parents’ discussion board. Thank you for your post. My name is Suzie. I am Family Rights Group’s online adviser. I am sorry to hear that you are in a difficult family situation. You have already had some advice from a parent with experience of working with children’s services.
You and your partner disagree about following a working agreement recommended by children’s services. You are wondering what happens when one parent is refusing to work with the recommended agreement. We have a definition of a written agreement
here. I am not sure if this is the same as the working together agreement you mention.
As you posted on the
child protection and
pre-proceedings thread then I think that you are in this process. If so, this means that professionals have very serious concerns for your daughter’s welfare. If there is a child protection plan in place there has already been a decision made that your daughter is at continued risk of suffering
significant harm . Where there are pre-proceedings children’s services are thinking of going to court to apply for an
interim care order which would allow them to make decisions for a child including where and with whom she should live. So, whatever the reason for these processes the situation is serious.
Neither you nor your partner think that the agreement is necessary. Children’s services view is that it is necessary to safeguard your child. As the lead agency responsible for protecting children, it is important for parents to understand why they want you to work with this agreement which I imagine is a temporary safety plan. And to try to work in partnership with children’s services in this way. You are cooperating. However, your partner is refusing to. If he has a good reason not to, he should discuss this urgently with the social worker and ask them to consider amending the agreement. Otherwise, children’s services and other professionals are likely to interpret this as him minimising the concerns, not putting his child first therefore increasing the risk to her. He should also seek legal advice.
You can ask children’s services to be clear with you about what action they will take if they become more worried about your daughter’s safety e.g. if both parents are not agreeing to or keeping you the agreement. If you are in pre-proceedings, you will both have solicitors so can check with them.
You may find it helpful to look at this
FAQ which sets out the different ways in which children’s services may respond if they believe a child cannot be safely cared for at home. The most serious action would be to seek to remove a child from her home.
As you don’t say what the concerns are or what the agreement asks you both to do, I cannot offer any more specific advice. However, your partner’s refusal means that he will be seen as a higher risk to your daughter than if he cooperated. If so and if you continue to be in a relationship with him this may lead professionals to be concerned about your ability to prioritise your child over the relationship. This depends on the specific circumstances which you have not outlined.
You may find it useful to read the
Why? part of our website as this explains more about the types of issues which parents may need more help with and which can negatively affect children.
I hope this helps. If you would like further advice please post back, or call the freephone advice line on 0808 8010366, Mon to Fri, 9.30 am to 3.00 pm or send an advice enquiry.
Best wishes
Suzie