HELP?!

[Felicity0808]

Myself and my partner are considering trying for a child.

He is 31years old, he is on the Sex Offenders Register for an offence he committed when he was 16years old. (Has sex with a 13year old, thought she was his age). Alongside this he was also convicted of robbery and violent offences.

He is on the SOR indefinitely and has an indefinite SOPO.
He is deemed as low risk to children.

I have a good job and a strong family background. But I have previously (with another partner) been deemed a High Risk Domestic Violence victim. I went against the advice of police and social workers in not pressing charges. I also have autism and whilst I am High Functioning, I am currently undergoing private EMDR.

Whilst the police and probation are happy with the changes he has made. He has a good job, does not drink, smoke or take drugs (neither do I). My concern is that at 16weeks pregnant Children’s Services could make decisions about our child. I would obviously always put my child first, but the last thing I want to be is a single mum, or have to live alone away from my partner. I was wondering if anyone has been in a similar situation or could offer any advice?
I have seen many cases whereby fathers on the SOR have been permitted supervised contact, but struggled to find cases whereby unsupervised contact has be allowed.

Any help or guidance would be greatly appreciated. Many Thanks F x

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear Felicity0808

Thank you for your post and welcome to the board.

If you are still in the planning stages, you could contact children’s services in your area prior to becoming pregnant and ask their views. If or when you do become pregnant and engage with maternity services they will ask about your history and (I imagine) you will disclose your partner’s details, and they are highly likely to make a referral to children’s services. Since, at this moment this is speculative, do have a look at our website pages for parents to be.

Lucy Faithfull, is a charity that may help too, it is here.

The NSPCC has a programme called Women as Protectors here is a flyer about this.

Unlock is another charity that may be helpful, here are their contact details.

I hope this information is helpful.

Best wishes

Suzie