False abduction allegation, SS, then more false allegations, police.

[HappyFathersDay]

I'll try to make this succinct:

- My ex-partner and I moved abroad last year with our 2-year-old child.
- She has a diagnosed personality disorder and her mental health declined, putting our child at risk.
- I suggested she seek help, and in January, while I was away, she took our child to the UK without my consent.
- She later apologized and asked me to pick up our child and return home, intending to stay in the UK for therapy.
- Weeks later, she struggled and demanded I return to the UK so she could claim homelessness or illegally claim benefits. I refused, suggesting she stabilize first.
- She falsely reported child abduction to UK police and initiated Hague Convention proceedings. The child was returned to her, not due to abduction but lack of support in our current country.
- I haven't seen my child in person for three months. Phone calls are sporadic and poor quality due to interference.
- I shared 50/50 childcare duties and had a strong, affectionate relationship with our child.
- A social worker was assigned due to the abduction allegation, but I received no response to my attempts to contact her.
- I went to the police to address the abduction claim, which was disproven. My ex then made further false allegations of abuse.
- The police dropped the abduction claim but wrongly interpreted the situation based on my ex's false information.
- She also lied to the courts in the third country but faced no consequences.
- I returned to the UK immediately after our child was sent back, fearing for her safety due to her mother's mental health. My concerns to social services and police were ignored.
- I filed an urgent C100, thinking my ex was living with her mother, but she wasn't. Three months later, the court has not issued proceedings or scheduled a hearing, claiming to transfer the case to another court.
- I'm left not formally knowing why I can't see my child. I've heard that social services advised my ex not to let me see her based on the false abduction allegation. Ironically, she was the one who abducted our child.
- The court application is stalled, and I have no contact from social services. I'm awaiting the police investigation into her new allegations, which are strategic and baseless.

Any advice or insight is welcome.

[HappyFathersDay]

I wasn't even "allowed" to see my child on Father's Day or on her birthday. The ex's family all know how unstable she is and yet have all fallen into line to do her bidding.

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear HappyFathersDay

Welcome to the parents’ discussion board. Thank you for your post. My name is Suzie. I am Family Rights Group’s online adviser.

I am sorry to hear about your difficult family situation. You explain that you have not seen your daughter for 3 months. I can understand how distressing this must be.

You have provided background information about your ex-partner’s mental health, the allegations of child abduction that were made and subsequent allegations made by your ex-partner against you which you say are false.

You have acted proactively by starting private law court proceedings for a Child Arrangements Order (CAO) to ask the court to consider what arrangements should be made for you to see or care for your daughter. Unfortunately, there has been a delay in issuing the proceedings and setting a hearing date, as it seems the case must be transferred to a different court. This must be frustrating for you.

I am unable to advise on the private law matter as this is outside our remit but if you need further advice about this then you may be able to get this from a solicitor or Child Law Advice. You may also find Advice Now’s downloadable guides to the family court and making arrangements for children helpful.

You state that you are waiting to hear from the police in relation to the more recent allegations that your ex-partner has made and which you refute. You have not said what the nature of these allegations are. If they relate to allegations of domestic abuse then you may wish to read our domestic abuse FAQs for fathers.

It is not clear whether children’s services are currently involved with your daughter and if so in what capacity they are involved. This limits the advice I can give. However, it seems they did receive a referral when the allegations of child abduction were made. You also say that you contacted them to let them know that you were worried about your daughter’s welfare because of her mother’s mental health needs. If you are dissatisfied with their response you can consider making a complaint. If you would like to know more about how to do so please see this explanation.

If your daughter has a social worker, they should of course contact you and involve you, as a father with parental responsibility. However, they cannot share confidential information with you if it would put your ex-partner or daughter at risk. Children’s services have a duty to work with both parents when assessing or providing services to a child. Your situation may be more complicated if you are not aware where your daughter is living as social work involvement is determined by the area where the child lives. It may be that you will need to clarify via the court what the current situation is regarding children’s services involvement. The court has the power to locate a child and make decisions about whether and with whom to disclose this information. Please see Child Law Advice’s information on this issue here.

I hope this helps. If you have any further questions about children’s services then please post back or contact the advice service again via one of the following options linked to here.

You can find details of fathers’ services here.

Best wishes

Suzie