Family Rights Group | Parents’ Forum

Hi. Recently I have been in a domestic violence incident. I am currently 8 months pregnant. One day my ex (who isn’t the baby’s father and I have been split for over 14 months) entered my house unknowingly whilst I was sleep. And attacked me with a crotch. Police was called which resulted in SS been involved as I do have 2 other children 13, 9. I am not in a relationship with this man but he has been coming in and out for over a year since we broke up resulting in arguments which had lead to a physical attack. I was in a new relationship and happy we had a baby on way. My new now ex partner has walked away. SS have never been involved with me and I’m not known to the police but some how I am been asked to attend a child protection meeting. Why am I been punished for someone else’s action? He entered my house while o was asleep and I haven’t been with him for about 14 months. This is first involvement with the police. I understand how and what I need to do to project my kids. So why am I been so looked into.

It's probably concerning to them that a violent man was able to enter your house while you were alone in the house with the children, vulnerable and pregnant.

Maybe a concern is that it could happen again in the future and that your newborn might get hurt.

Just work with social services and explore with them how the children can be kept safe.

Dear Jle1,

Thank you for post and welcome to the parents’ forum. My name is Suzie and I am an online adviser responding to you today.
Congratulations on your pregnancy.

I am appalled to read about the violent attack on you by your ex-partner. This must have been such a frightening and traumatic experience at such an advanced stage of your pregnancy.

Police were called to your home and as you have two children aged 13 and 9 in the household, they liaised with children’s service. An initial child protection case conference is now planned, and you are worried about this.

I hope that I can provide useful information and advice about child protection processes here. You can read about what happens at an initial child protection case conference here. Family Rights Group have prepared short films to help you know what to expect here.

It is important to remember that although this attack was not your fault, the actions of your ex are a threat to the safety of the children and your unborn baby so children’s services have a duty to investigate and assess your circumstances and work collaboratively with you to decide what could be done to prevent any further harm.

You may feel that you need some extra support at the conference from a family member or friend alongside you. You could request that children’s services provide an advocate. Family Rights Group have a template letter that you could use to make this request. You can link to it here Letter 1 is the one you need. You can read more about working with an advocate here.

There are domestic abuse support organisations that may be able to help you with safety planning and dealing with the emotional aftermath for you and the children.
The Refuge national domestic abuse helpline is here You can read about the role of independent domestic abuse advisers (IDVA) here.
Also, you may receive useful support from Victim Support here.

Birth Companions are an independent charity that offer support to women who are due to give birth while also dealing with challenging circumstances. You can link to their website here.

I hope this information was useful to you.

There are many different ways to contact Family Rights Group if you seek further advice in the future:

• A free telephone advice line open Monday to Friday between 9.30am and 3pm (excluding Bank Holidays) on 0808 801 0366
• Easy-to-follow online information. Features include an A-Z, FAQs, films, ‘top tips’ and legal advice sheets;
• Online forums where families can receive advice, discuss issues, and find support;
• A webchat service where you can message an adviser online, who will help you find information and advice to support you.


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