Ex in prison seeking contact with our 3 year old daughter
Ex in prison seeking contact with our 3 year old daughter
He was sent to prison nearly 4 years ago (when our daughter was 3 months old) I cut contact with him over 2 years ago as he continued to manipulate and control me from prison. i was a shell of a person because of him, he tried to kill me so he was sentence to 10 years in prison. Last year I got help for my alcohol addiction and my mother took care of my children (i have a 5 year old boy to another man) the social services got involved as I was a mess. I am going to court to get my children back but of course because my ex who is in jail is on the birth certificate of my daughter has been informed and now is piggy backing on the fact that he has this free pass/ opportunity to seek access/ contact with his daughter as its the local authority who initially took this to court. Can I prevent my ex from having any contact because of his past towards me and others? He is trying his best to worm his way in and making up lies about me to the local authority even though i havent seen him in hears and hes sitting in a jail cell!
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Suzie, FRG Adviser
- Posts: 4782
- Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 1:57 pm
Re: Ex in prison seeking contact with our 3 year old daughter
Dear ANCA1202
Welcome to the parents’ discussion board. Thank you for your post. My name is Suzie. I am Family Rights Group’s online adviser.
I am very sorry to hear about the abuse that you suffered from your ex-partner. Do you have any support in place for yourself? A domestic abuse service (please see here for links) or Supportline may be able to offer you emotional support following your experiences of abuse from your daughter’s father.
It is really good to hear that you accessed help for your alcohol misuse difficulties last year. I hope that you are continuing to make good progress.
You explain that your mother became your children’s carer last year too. Children’s services were involved also. I think that there were care proceedings which resulted in the court making an order which allowed your mother to continue caring for your children. But I don’t know if she is a kinship foster carer, caring for your children under a care order or if she has a Special Guardianship Order (SGO) or a Child Arrangements Order (CAO) for the children. It may be more likely to be an SGO.
You are now going back to court to try to end whichever order is in place and hoping that the children can be returned to your care. It would be helpful to know which order you are applying to end so that I could provide more specific advice.
You are very worried that your daughter’s father will use your court application to seek contact with your daughter and probably that he will try to manipulate you/the situation. You explain that he is trying to do this already from prison, he has contacted the local authority to make allegations against you.
I can understand how frustrating and worrying this is. As a father with parental responsibility for your daughter he is legally entitled to be a party to the proceedings. However, in view of his history and conviction for trying to kill you, the court will be very aware of the risk he may pose to your daughter and how he may use this process to control you. If you have a solicitor representing you in the court case, please discuss your concerns fully with them to seek their legal advice about how to ensure that the court prioritises your daughter’s safety and yours as a victim of domestic abuse.
If you wanted the court to make an order restricting your ex-partner’s parental responsibility then you would need to get specific private law legal advice about this. The court decides on a case-by-case basis You may have heard of ‘Jade’s Law’ but there are specific criteria for this to apply. Please see below links to where you can get this (private law) below.
Child Law Advice. They do have a telephone helpline which you can reach on 0300 330 5480. In addition, they offer helpful information and guidance for parents/carers in your type of situation and have ‘how to’ guides that you can download for around £2 each. Please do check out their website.
Advicenow
is a website that helps you find the best information and advice for your legal problems. You can choose from a range of categories, such as divorce and separation, child custody and residence, and more.
Rights of Women. Their family law telephone advice lines can advise you on divorce, cohabitation, parental responsibility and arrangements for children, domestic violence and abuse, finances and property on relationship breakdown, and more.
I would also strongly encourage you to contact children’s services directly (if they are still involved) to dispute any allegations your ex-partner has made against you. And to clarify their current role with your children.
If you would like to discuss your situation in more detail then please contact the advice line to speak to an adviser on freephone 0808 8010366, Mon to Fri, 9.30 am to 3.00 pm (except bank holidays). Or post back on this forum, use our advice enquiry form or webchat facilities. Please say what order is in place for the children which you are asking the court to end.
I hope this is helpful.
Best wishes
Suzie
Welcome to the parents’ discussion board. Thank you for your post. My name is Suzie. I am Family Rights Group’s online adviser.
I am very sorry to hear about the abuse that you suffered from your ex-partner. Do you have any support in place for yourself? A domestic abuse service (please see here for links) or Supportline may be able to offer you emotional support following your experiences of abuse from your daughter’s father.
It is really good to hear that you accessed help for your alcohol misuse difficulties last year. I hope that you are continuing to make good progress.
You explain that your mother became your children’s carer last year too. Children’s services were involved also. I think that there were care proceedings which resulted in the court making an order which allowed your mother to continue caring for your children. But I don’t know if she is a kinship foster carer, caring for your children under a care order or if she has a Special Guardianship Order (SGO) or a Child Arrangements Order (CAO) for the children. It may be more likely to be an SGO.
You are now going back to court to try to end whichever order is in place and hoping that the children can be returned to your care. It would be helpful to know which order you are applying to end so that I could provide more specific advice.
You are very worried that your daughter’s father will use your court application to seek contact with your daughter and probably that he will try to manipulate you/the situation. You explain that he is trying to do this already from prison, he has contacted the local authority to make allegations against you.
I can understand how frustrating and worrying this is. As a father with parental responsibility for your daughter he is legally entitled to be a party to the proceedings. However, in view of his history and conviction for trying to kill you, the court will be very aware of the risk he may pose to your daughter and how he may use this process to control you. If you have a solicitor representing you in the court case, please discuss your concerns fully with them to seek their legal advice about how to ensure that the court prioritises your daughter’s safety and yours as a victim of domestic abuse.
If you wanted the court to make an order restricting your ex-partner’s parental responsibility then you would need to get specific private law legal advice about this. The court decides on a case-by-case basis You may have heard of ‘Jade’s Law’ but there are specific criteria for this to apply. Please see below links to where you can get this (private law) below.
Child Law Advice. They do have a telephone helpline which you can reach on 0300 330 5480. In addition, they offer helpful information and guidance for parents/carers in your type of situation and have ‘how to’ guides that you can download for around £2 each. Please do check out their website.
Advicenow
is a website that helps you find the best information and advice for your legal problems. You can choose from a range of categories, such as divorce and separation, child custody and residence, and more.
Rights of Women. Their family law telephone advice lines can advise you on divorce, cohabitation, parental responsibility and arrangements for children, domestic violence and abuse, finances and property on relationship breakdown, and more.
I would also strongly encourage you to contact children’s services directly (if they are still involved) to dispute any allegations your ex-partner has made against you. And to clarify their current role with your children.
If you would like to discuss your situation in more detail then please contact the advice line to speak to an adviser on freephone 0808 8010366, Mon to Fri, 9.30 am to 3.00 pm (except bank holidays). Or post back on this forum, use our advice enquiry form or webchat facilities. Please say what order is in place for the children which you are asking the court to end.
I hope this is helpful.
Best wishes
Suzie
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