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DV, drugs & new boyfriend

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DPE
Posts: 1
Joined: Fri Apr 04, 2025 6:24 pm

DV, drugs & new boyfriend

Post by DPE » Mon Apr 07, 2025 4:20 pm

Hi
My son & his girlfriend had my grandson (GS) removed placed with me on section 20, returned to mam when she worked on what was advised, behind the scenes the DV occurred over an affair with their drug dealer which continued when my son & mam separated, she denied this all along.
Once GS was out of my care section 47 was placed & mam declared this affair was now her boyfriend, Social worker (SW) stated safeguarding plan now amended as new boyfriend cannot have access to GS without doing a perpetrator course with Harbour local DV support group then he would only be allowed supervised contact.
My son's supervision was done by his best friend who then saw the 3 of then together (mam, GS & boyfriend) all was reported to social services & local police, nothing was done despite breaking safeguarding plan, I was advised by FRG about child protection unit within police who said he has no bail conditions in place.
Every safety plan has been broken since April 2024 when my GS was put on child protection, now mam has moved her new boyfriend into the family home.
SW has gone back on her word, saying as he has presented well to them they have no concerns. So I asked if parents have had to drug test when is boyfriend being drug tested? He has DV on his record towards previous partners, is a known dealer & user but SW states unless it is a matter of live or death they will do nothing.
I'm frustrated obviously surely this is LA not safeguarding my grandson too? I am unsure on what I can do next for my GS as he is too young to speak for himself, my GS is 3 almost 4 years old with delayed speech

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Suzie, FRG Adviser
Posts: 1114
Joined: Thu Jul 28, 2011 12:25 pm

Re: DV, drugs & new boyfriend

Post by Suzie, FRG Adviser » Thu Apr 10, 2025 2:50 pm

Dear DPE,

Thank you for your post and welcome to the kinship carers' forum.

You write that you previously cared for your 3 year old grandson under a S.20 voluntary agreement until children’s services judged that there had been progress made on the risks in the home and he was returned to his mother’s care. Your son and the mother have since separated and your son now has supervised contact with his child.

Since April 2024 your grandson has been on a child protection plan. You can read more about child protection plans here.

You understood that the mother's new partner had been asked to complete a domestic violence perpetrator course with Harbour (an agency that delivers perpetrator work to male and females displaying violence, abuse and/or controlling behaviours towards others) so that supervised contact with your grandson could be considered. However, you explain that a friend of your son has seen mother and her new partner together with her new partner and child; and further you believe that her new partner is now living in the home in breach of the safety plan agreed with children’s services.

You write that children’s services are aware that the mother’s new partner is living in the home and you understand that they have changed their opinion as to the level of risk he presents. You do not agree with this assessment and do not know why the plan has changed. You want reassurance that children’s services are safeguarding your grandson.

Your son may have parental responsibility for your grandson and could raise the concerns with the social worker. You could also speak to the social worker about your concerns for your grandson.

If you feel that the concerns are not being listened to your son could consider making a formal complaint. You can read more about complaints here.

You may find the National Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Children (NSPCC) pages on how to keep children safe helpful. NSPCC also have a helpline for people who are concerned about a child’s welfare on 0808 800 5000. Email: help@NSPCC.org.uk.

Should you wish to speak with one of our experienced advisers, you can telephone our advice line on 0808 801 0366. The advice line is open from 9.30am to 3.00pm Monday to Friday (excluding Bank Holidays.

I hope this is helpful

Best wishes

Suzie
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Robin D
Posts: 2140
Joined: Sat Aug 21, 2004 1:58 pm

Re: DV, drugs & new boyfriend

Post by Robin D » Sat Apr 12, 2025 12:54 pm

I can confirm from one personal experience that disinterest (almost utter contempt) to our concerns about a child did a full 180 turn once a referral was received from the NSPCC. You can contact them anonymously if needed.

Interesting another case we were involved in court with had a referral from the NSPCC that a child was at risk during contact. The social worker unhelpfully told the mum it had come from us which was completely untrue. I don't know who did make it as the NSPCC would not confirm but was grateful they had. The court ordered that CAFCASS look at it as the social worker might not being doing enough to protect the child.
Former F&F carer, foster carer, adopter and respite carer for umpteen children. Now retired and when with kids, making sure they 'go home' at the end of the day.

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