Please help! 😭😭

[mamaof5]

Back in December 2019 social care first become involved with our family. They were receiving almost daily malicious reports stating I was an alcoholic, left my children home alone, injuries to my children ect
The alleged injuries were always proven to not be there. One said my youngest had a black eye and limp but when police come they didn’t have any injuries.

With the pressure of social care intervention, constant malicious reports, covid & lockdown, homeschooling and so on my mental health took a nosedive. I felt depressed, paranoid, untrusting & at times suicidal. They tried me on loads of different medications and doses and it made my mental health worse.

December last year they put me on olanzapine & mitazapine which made me so drowsy I was physically unable to look after myself let alone 5 children so I stopped taking it

My mental health lifted and I was almost back to my normal self. The children’s attendance also improved massively (around 60% previously to over 97%)

We were getting our lives back on track when April 11th 2022 our newly allocated Sw come round at 5:30pm to tell me the LA were taking me to court on the 13th as they felt my children were better off in foster care

On April 13th the judge adjourned as the LA had not sent him the court bundle, they hadn’t given me enough time to prepare ect

April 26th we were back in court and within 5mins of court starting and interim care order was granted. All 5 of my babies were removed from school within the hour and taken away on my 7year olds birthday

I get to see them twice a week for 1.5hrs

My 2 oldest (10 & 9) were placed together, my middle (8) completely alone and my youngest 2 (7 & 4) together.

My oldest 2 were at their first placement for 5 weeks, due to concerns raised by me, my children and allocated Sw it was decided to move them somewhere else as they weren’t being cared for properly. They moved last Wednesday and now doing a lot better.

I have no clue about the court process, we were meant to have a directions hearing the first available date after 20th May and we still don’t have a date.

I just want my children home. Ive seen my mental health doctor and been on a new medication since April 14th and it’s worked wonders, I’m seeing a therapist, house and garden been completely tidied/cleaned/organised.

My middle child’s father is trying to get granted care of her and wants to remove her from the country to live with him in XXXX so I would lose her forever he has no relationship with her at all and didn’t become involved with her until she was 7, since then he has seen her a maximum of 2-3 times. It would destroy her to be taken away from us.

What usually happens at a directions hearing?

We don’t have a final court date yet either. 26weeks will be up in October but judging by how long it’s taking to get a directions hearing we will be lucky to get a final court hearing this year

I just want my babies home

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear Mama of 5

Welcome to the parents’ discussion forum and thank you for your post. My name is Suzie and I am FRG’s online adviser. I am sorry to hear about the difficulties you and your family are experiencing.

Your children are in foster care under interim care orders at present. You are confused about the court process, not sure what a directions hearing is and, understandably, you would like your children returned home to your care.

I can see that you experienced significant mental health difficulties over the last couple of years, possibly exacerbated by the pressures of ‘lockdown.’ I think children’s services were concerned that the impact of this was that your children were not being cared for well enough and in fact were being harmed as a result . We have tailored information about mental health here. I am really pleased to hear that your mental health is stabilising, that you have been able to access therapy and you have improved your home and garden conditions. Do keep up all your good work.

I hope that you have a solicitor representing you in the court case. Here are some tips on working with a solicitor which might be helpful to you. The tips on working with a social worker also contain some useful practical advice.

The information in our care proceedings pages should help you understand more about the care proceedings process including the different hearings, possible outcomes and how decisions are made.

A directions hearing is where the court gives instructions about what work needs to be done, by whom, when and it sets down the court timescale. Please see fuller information here. The forthcoming directions hearing should help make the process clearer for you; the most important thing for you to know is what assessments you need to do, what action you need to take and what support you need to make or maintain enough improvements to be able to safely care for your children again.

Children’s services must consider if either or both parents can care for the children safely and they must consider possible family and friends carers too. This includes involving and assessing your middle daughter’s father However, all decisions made must be based on the child’s best interests so there will be a number of factors to be considered. Have you been offered a family group conference (FGC) yet to try to harness your network? You can request this if it has not been offered yet. Please see here for more details.

You can find out more about the care planning and reviewing processes that are happening here. Try to be as involved and informed as you can and make sure you have a copy of all the Looked After Child plans that have been prepared.

If you have any further queries or would like to discuss your situation with an adviser please call our freephone advice helpline on 0808 8010366, Mon to Fri, 9.30 am to 3.00 pm. Or post back on this forum.

Best wishes

Suzie