Cp plan and ex not allowed in house

[JHFGF2]

Hello there
I have been placed on child protection plan with my 3 children for domestic violence with an ex partner(childrens dad) This is because of an incident in august but he has previous history with other women so they say he’s a danger as kids have witnessed abuse. They say he’s not to enter the family home. I’ve explained to them that he is in a house share so nowhere to take the children. And on cold wet days I would rather him come see them at home for an hour then be walking around in the wet weather as he also doesn’t drive. They said it’s not my problem and he still can’t enter the home. I’ve said about Christmas as it’s also our daughters first christmas they’ve still said no. Where do I stand on this? If he has nowhere to take them then id rather him see them at my home. Do they have any rights to stop this? Or will it make matters worse? As in will I lose my children?

[Suzie, FRG Adviser]

Dear JHFGF2,

Welcome to the parents’ forum and thank you for your post. I am sorry to hear about the difficulties that you are facing and I hope that the following advice is of some help.

Your children are subject to a child protection plan because there was a domestic violence incident which occurred between you and your children’s father. The father also has been accused of violence towards previous partners. Children’s services have recommended that he is not to enter your home. You are finding this difficult because you say that he has no where else to see the children. You would like to know what powers children’s services have in this situation.

In your current situation children’s services can only make recommendations regarding contact between your children and their father. They cannot enforce their recommendations as they do not have parental responsibility for the children. This means that legally there is nothing stopping you allowing the father into your home.

However, if you go against children’s services recommendations it is likely that they will become more concerned about your children. This may result in them starting care proceedings and could lead to the court making a care order. This would give children’s services parental responsibility and would mean that they could remove the children from your care if they felt it necessary to do so.

For this reason I would encourage you to take children’s services recommendations seriously and work with them as best as possible. If you believe it is in your children’s best interests to have contact with their father then it would be a good idea to ask children’s services how they can support you with this. For example they may be able to help arrange supervised sessions at a contact centre, or come up with a plan that supports the children having contact with their father in a public space (at a shopping centre or soft play area for example). You could also ask children’s services to hold a Family Group Conference as this may be helpful in identifying if there are any other members of your support network (including both family and friends) who might be able to offer support with contact arrangements.

During the child protection process the social worker will be assessing your capacity to keep your children safe. Exposure to domestic abuse is a serious concern and can have long term negative impacts on children. For this reason it sounds sensible for children’s services to recommend that the father is not to enter your home. If he enters the house then the children are more likely to be exposed to domestic violence which is harmful to them (as well as yourself). Therefore it is advisable for you to work with children’s services and the father to come up with alternative contact arrangements.

You can find more information about children’s services involvement when there are concerns about domestic abuse HERE.

You don’t say if you have received any support regarding the domestic abuse incident. Our useful links page has information about various organisations that might be able offer you some support. Please see HERE for more information.

I hope that the above has been of some help. If you would like any further advice then you can either post here again or call our free, confidential helpline on 0808 801 0366 (Monday to Friday, 9:30am – 3pm) to speak with an adviser.

Best wishes,
Suzie