Firstly some good news been told that my son and daughter are not longer on the child protection plan nor on a child in need following the last child conference meeting that's the good news however the child who caused all this upset
Who decided not to live here following problems that happened and things he was doing towards his younger siblings was there my two youngest that they didn't want him living here.
Now over 2 years now had number of threats either call wise or while out either to myself or my daughter now its moved on to my wife in one week threats in tex and posted letters
We have found that the social worker said to him to write.
However dont think they viewed the letter my mum saw the letter because at moment he still there she pleased with him not to send letters but he did she is terminally ill and hasn't the strength to ask him to move on he is 17 year old. Now today I had to call to my mum address because of her health was greated by threats and him calling the police on me makeing fake claims that I was beating him up when I'd come to speak to my mum we had to go to my car while there number threats made towards me and claims he would smash up my car. His social worker called up other day saying that he wanted to work on the relationship between myself and wife and he understood that he has done things wrong. However there tex and letter say other wise.
We have had to call police now because he has been hanging around the school where our daughter goes three times now she has had massive panic attack she is sitting her GCSE and worried that if this would happen on exam day she wont be able to do exams
My last call from police that want to get domestic unit to help but still doesn't help either my wife my own health as we are always looking over our shoulders nerves go when either of us get a phone call from number we dont recognise it's no way to live
Harassment
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Suzie, FRG Adviser
- Posts: 4996
- Joined: Mon Jul 04, 2011 2:57 pm
Re: Harassment
Dear Magic lord
Thank you for your updating posts. I will reply to both your posts here.
It is good to hear that children’s services are no longer involved with your younger son and daughter. You say that the plan for the children came to an end at the last conference. A child in need plan is usually made when a child protection plan ends. However, you say that there is no child in need plan in place. I wonder are Early Help involved or has the children’s case been fully closed?
From what you say, your 17 year old son still has a social worker. You have explained that he is still living with your mum. I am sorry to hear that she is terminally ill. That must be very distressing for you and your family.
You describe how your son is being very threatening and abusive to you, your wife, and your daughter. This is clearly impacting on you all, especially your daughter who is doing her GCSEs. Your son has made allegations against you to the police. You have also had to contact the police about your son. You are concerned that he is harassing your daughter by hanging around outside her school. It sounds like a very difficult situation for your family.
Your son’s social worker has said that your son is aware of his mistakes and wants to work on rebuilding his relationship with you and your wife. But you are concerned that your son’s behaviour is threatening. The police have suggested involving domestic abuse services.
As your son has a social worker, it might be a good idea to contact them now to make sure that they have a full understanding of recent events and all that your family is going through. The situation you described is upsetting for everyone involved. You need help and support at this time. The social worker should recommend what they think will help the situation.
You don’t say if your son has additional needs or a disability that may impact on his behaviour. This is also something to take into consideration, with the social worker or other agencies, when trying to find a way forward.
It may be a good idea that you get some specific advice from a domestic abuse service, as the police suggested. There is a service called PEGS that you may be interested in. They support families (and can advise professionals) where a young person is being violent at home or to family members. Your son may be able to access support from one of the services listed in the Respect Young Person’s directory.
If your son was 18 or over, then you could consider applying for a non-molestation order. This is a civil order that a court can make to prevent someone from harassing, intimidating or pestering a related person. However, this is not the right approach for a young person who is under 18.
Your daughter may benefit from some support as she is being impacted by her brother’s behaviour. She may be interested in getting some help from ChildLine, Young Minds or specialist support from a domestic abuse project.
As you and your wife are struggling and the situation is taking an emotional toll on you, you may want to get some help for yourselves too. Your GP may be helpful. There are a number of services such as those listed here and here which can offer a listening ear when things are stressful. I mentioned PEGS above. You could also access counselling or befriending support from Family Lives.
I hope this has been useful. If you have any further queries about children’s services’ role please post again or contact the advice service via one of our other options:
• Our freephone advice line 0808 8010366, Mon to Fri, 9.30 am to 3.00 pm (except bank holidays)
• Webchat
• Advice enquiry form .
Best wishes
Suzie
Thank you for your updating posts. I will reply to both your posts here.
It is good to hear that children’s services are no longer involved with your younger son and daughter. You say that the plan for the children came to an end at the last conference. A child in need plan is usually made when a child protection plan ends. However, you say that there is no child in need plan in place. I wonder are Early Help involved or has the children’s case been fully closed?
From what you say, your 17 year old son still has a social worker. You have explained that he is still living with your mum. I am sorry to hear that she is terminally ill. That must be very distressing for you and your family.
You describe how your son is being very threatening and abusive to you, your wife, and your daughter. This is clearly impacting on you all, especially your daughter who is doing her GCSEs. Your son has made allegations against you to the police. You have also had to contact the police about your son. You are concerned that he is harassing your daughter by hanging around outside her school. It sounds like a very difficult situation for your family.
Your son’s social worker has said that your son is aware of his mistakes and wants to work on rebuilding his relationship with you and your wife. But you are concerned that your son’s behaviour is threatening. The police have suggested involving domestic abuse services.
As your son has a social worker, it might be a good idea to contact them now to make sure that they have a full understanding of recent events and all that your family is going through. The situation you described is upsetting for everyone involved. You need help and support at this time. The social worker should recommend what they think will help the situation.
You don’t say if your son has additional needs or a disability that may impact on his behaviour. This is also something to take into consideration, with the social worker or other agencies, when trying to find a way forward.
It may be a good idea that you get some specific advice from a domestic abuse service, as the police suggested. There is a service called PEGS that you may be interested in. They support families (and can advise professionals) where a young person is being violent at home or to family members. Your son may be able to access support from one of the services listed in the Respect Young Person’s directory.
If your son was 18 or over, then you could consider applying for a non-molestation order. This is a civil order that a court can make to prevent someone from harassing, intimidating or pestering a related person. However, this is not the right approach for a young person who is under 18.
Your daughter may benefit from some support as she is being impacted by her brother’s behaviour. She may be interested in getting some help from ChildLine, Young Minds or specialist support from a domestic abuse project.
As you and your wife are struggling and the situation is taking an emotional toll on you, you may want to get some help for yourselves too. Your GP may be helpful. There are a number of services such as those listed here and here which can offer a listening ear when things are stressful. I mentioned PEGS above. You could also access counselling or befriending support from Family Lives.
I hope this has been useful. If you have any further queries about children’s services’ role please post again or contact the advice service via one of our other options:
• Our freephone advice line 0808 8010366, Mon to Fri, 9.30 am to 3.00 pm (except bank holidays)
• Webchat
• Advice enquiry form .
Best wishes
Suzie
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